The Sorrowful Sunshine Eventuality
by hokie3457
Summary: An ending; followed by some awful news.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N Got stuck on another story I'm working on, but I'll get there. This one has been on my mind for quite awhile. I started writing it a week ago and thought what the heck. Not sure exactly how long it will be 12 to 15 chapters I think. There are many things that inspired this and I'll let you know as they come up in the chapters. For chapter 1, the main inspiration came from the song "Nowhere to be found" by John Fullbright. **

**The impetus for this first chapter is an event that happens "off-screen". We won't know what the event was. Only the two main characters will ever know. Some friends will know what it isn't but never what it is...I know a little odd, but oh well.**

**Thanks for your patience. This was a rambling A/N, so thanks. As always reviews, both good and bad are always appreciated. Also I own nothing having to** do** with The Big Bang Theory (other than some dvd's). **

"Leonard, I mean it. Get out of the way and let me by." There was a fire in her eyes. He had seen it before, but it had never, ever been directed at him. Never this kind of anger. "Don't make me do something that we will both regret."

He was holding her by her arms. Her left was bent at the elbow; her hand was balled into a fist. She was pulling away from him. Another thing she had never done.

He released her and she stormed off.

"Penny, wait" he called to her.

She spun around and looked at him. The fiery anger was still there, but there was something else as well-hurt. Extreme, heartbreaking hurt. She spread her arms with the palms of her hands facing upwards.

"What Leonard? What?" He looked at her blankly.

"What can you possibly have to say that you think I need to hear?"

He could not reply. She shook her head. Easing the muscles in her arms, her hands fell to her sides. She shook her head again. Sadly this time, and walked away.

"What the heck was that about?" Howard asked.

"I think that was about it", Leonard replied sadly, looking toward he door. After a beat he said "Howard, where is Bernadette?"

"She should be on her way here."

Leonard pulled out his cell phone and swiped through his contacts. Finding her number, he tapped the screen and brought the phone to his ear.

"Bernadette-"

"Hi Leonard", came the reply, chirpily.

"Are you on your way over here?"

"Um, I'm just about to leave. Why? What is it?"

"You'll find out when you get here. Penny needs you. Can you pick up Amy?"

"Penny needs me?" she questioned, confused.

"Yeah." He turned his back from Howard, Raj and Sheldon and said lowly into the phone "I think-I think…." his voice trailed off.

"Leonard! What is it. You're scaring me."

"Bernadette. It over" he said it with a sigh.

"I'll be there as soon as I can." She said it sadly, then added, "Leonard, are you alright?"

He was quiet for a few seconds before answering "no Bernadette. I'm not."

He disconnected from the call and placed the cell phone in his pocket. Turning around he said to his friends, "I'm going to go out for awhile. I'll see you all later."

"Wait Leonard" Raj said. He turned around with his hand on the doorknob. "Where are you going?"

"I'm not sure Raj. I just need to go and maybe clear my head."

"Do you want one of us to go with you, buddy?" Howard asked walking toward him.

"No Howard. I need to be alone I think, but thanks anyway. Thanks Raj. Sheldon, I'll see you later. Don't wait up for me."

"Don't wait up for you? Aren't you coming back with dinner?"

"Um…"

"Sheldon, Raj and I will go and get dinner. It's okay" Howard answered for Leonard.

With an annoyed look on his face Sheldon said "then I'll have to write down explicit instructions for you. You know what happened last time you two tried to pull off a food delivery here."

No one noticed Leonard leaving until they heard the door click shut.

Amy and Bernadette walked quickly up to the 4th floor. "Amy, you go over to Penny's. I'm going to see Howard for a quick second."

"Well let me go with you to say hello to Sheldon"

Bernadette paused for a minute. She could tell Amy didn't want to go to see Penny alone-she had told her that Leonard said the relationship was over.

"C'mon" Bernadette pulled her by the sleeve toward 4A. They entered and saw only Sheldon sitting in his spot on the sofa.

"Hello Sheldon" Amy said quietly as she approached him sitting next to him. "How is everything going over here after, well after the…"

"Hello Amy Farrah Fowler. Do you mean how is everything after the drama that unfolded here between Penny and Leonard?"

"Yes. Is everything alright?"

Giving a large sigh Sheldon began: "Well Penny stormed out after yelling at Leonard and I think there was even a threat of violence. Not out of the ordinary with the 'Nebraska Whirlwind'. Let me see, then Leonard skulked off, shirking his duties of picking up my-I mean our dinner, with no other explanation than 'I need to clear my head'; if it's not clear by now it never will be. Then I had to send out Raj and Howard to pick up my-I mean our dinner. I do not have a lot of faith in a successful completion of that task by the way-no offense Bernadette."

"Plenty taken Sheldon" Dr. Rostenkowski-Wolowiz answered flatly. Sheldon's head jerked back quickly then he shook his head.

"Amy, would you like to play a round of counterfactuals before dinner arrives?"

"Uh Sheldon, we're going across the hall to check on Penny. It sounds like she really need us" Amy answered.

"Well for someone who thinks she will be an actress someday, she does not handle drama very well."

Ignoring his remark, Bernadette said gruffly "Sheldon, tell Howard that I'm at Penny's when he gets back". She then took Amy by the hand and said "let's get over there Amy."

"Amy turned around and smiled shyly at Sheldon and said "I'll drop by to see you in a little bit."

"I hope you are successful in whatever it is you plan on doing" he called to her as they walked out the door.

Bernadette smiled sadly at Amy and said "here we go." She knocked softly on the door and called "Penny. Penny, It's Bernadette and Amy." There was no answer. She knocked again. Amy said "hey Bestie, we're here to keep you company." Still no reply. Bernadette knocked twice and said "we're coming in sweetie and opened the door.

The apartment was dark except for three or four candles spread throughout. "Penny?" Amy said warily.

"I'm here guys. On the love seat." Penny answered softly and sadly.

"Do you want some lights on?"

"I really don't care" she answered without emotion.

Bernadette switched on the light and Amy went toward the candles, blowing them out. Penny sat at the far end of the love seat with her legs curled up under her; a tissue crumpled in her fist.

Both of her friends approached. Bernadette sat next to her, wrapping her arms around her; Amy sat on the floor placing her hand on Penny's leg and rested her chin on top of her hand.

Penny turned into Bernadette's embrace and grabbed Amy's hand and began to weep heavily into her friend's shoulder.

Bernadette stroked her hair and Amy rubbed her back. "Let it out honey. Let it out" Bernadette said sympathetically.

Penny began to calm down. Pulling away from Bernadette she breathed in deeply and nodded her head. She grabbed another tissue from the box on the coffee table and softly blew her nose. Amy handed her a second one and Penny dabbed at her red ringed eyes.

"Do you want to talk about it Bestie?" Amy asked quietly.

"There's not much to say Amy. We're through. Leonard and I. We've broken up. For good."

"I talked to him Penny. He seems pretty upset too."

"You talked to him?" she answered quickly.

"He called me to tell me that you needed us to come over. He said-well he said that it was over too. Penny-what happened?"

"He asked you to come here?" She began to cry again. After a few minutes she composed herself yet again.

"Sweetie" she asked again, softer "what happened?"

"The end happened" she said and began to cry again. Silently this time.

"But why Penny?" Everything seemed great with you two.

"Things aren't always what they seem Bernadette."

"Did he hurt you Bestie?" Amy asked bluntly. "Did he cheat on you?"

"No! No Amy. He didn't. He did not cheat on me. Both of you need to understand right now. Leonard did not cheat on me!" She said it firmly.

"He didn't physically hurt you-" Bernadette asked the question with horror on her face.

Penny grabbed her hand and said "no Bernadette. No one cheated on anyone. No one physically hurt anyone."

"Then what Penny. It will help to talk about it."

She shook her head no. "Right now, for me, the only thing that will help is not to talk about it."

Amy stood up. "How about some wine. Can I get you some?"

"No Ames. No wine. Maybe some water, but no wine. Not tonight."

Bernadette shrugged her shoulders. Amy returned to her spot on the floor with a bottle of water, handed it to her and held her friend's hand.

They spent the rest of the night just talking. Not really that much about Leonard or the end of his and Penny's relationship. Just everything else.

At one point Howard and Raj dropped by to bring them some Thai take out food. Bernadette asked if they passed the Sheldon test. Howard answered "barely. We got a C-." That got Penny to laughing.

At around 11:20, Bernadette asked if Penny wanted her and Amy to spend the night. She told them no that she would be alright. Walking her two friends to the door, all three exchanged long hard embraces and good nights. Penny closed the door softly behind them.

It was well past midnight when Leonard walked up the stairs to the 4th floor. He had been gone for nearly eight hours. When he got to the landing he saw that Penny's door was wide open and the lights in the living room were on.

He took a step toward 4B, but stopped when she appeared in the doorway.

"Hey you" she said.

He took in a quick deep breathe. That was her special way of greeting him.

"Hi" he said. "Are you alright?"

She nodded her head yes. He began to walk toward her. She shook her head no and put her hands up palms facing forward.

"Please Leonard stay over there. If you come here I'll just end up…Well just stay over there."

He took another step. She said sharply "Leonard!" He stopped and took two steps backward.

" I'm sorry, I just can't be close to you. Please understand."

He nodded his head in assent.

"I'm also sorry for how harsh I was earlier. We should have done that in private. Not in front of everyone."

"Did you tell them why?"

"No. And I won't. That's no one's business but ours." He nodded again and looked down at his feet.

"Look, I wanted to see you when you came back. I wanted to let you know that I won't make this awkward for you. I've decided to move. To find a place to live somewhere else. I think that would be best for everyone."

"No. You don't need to do that" he interrupted her.

"Leonard, it will be better for both of us if …."

"I know. I already took care of it" he said flatly.

She tilted her head and looked at him questioningly. "What do you mean?"

"One of the English professors at the university owns a duplex not far from work. Half of it was empty, so I asked and she let me have it for a good monthly rent."

"Why?" She asked.

"Look, you need the support of our friends and I don't want to think what kind of place you would end up in. Do this for me. Stay here. Let me be the one to leave.

She nodded her head and said "thank you Leonard."

"Well it's getting pretty late and we both have work tomorrow. I'm not looking forward to dealing with Sheldon, so I better go and get some sleep." This time he walked toward her and she didn't tell him to stop. He put his hand up near her face and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. He touched her cheek with his finger tips and said "I'm so sorry Penny."

"I'm sorry too" she answered. She said good night and went into her apartment. Leonard turned and went into 4A.

The next four weeks went by quickly. Leonard was busy packing up his belongings. His new landlord allowed him to start moving boxes in early so he didn't need to rush at the end of the month to get totally in.

During that time, he rarely saw Penny. Just coming and going in the hallway or in the stairwell. They traded quick "hellos" and "how is it going's". Nothing of substance. He rented a small truck for his furniture and enlisted Raj and Howard and Stuart from the comic book store to help.

The day had finally arrived. He had said his goodbye to Sheldon the night before. Amy had arranged to take him out for the day to keep him from being upset at Leonard's leaving. It had also been arranged that Amy would become his new roommate; taking over Leonard's room. They would let things progress in their own way and in their own time.

He opened the door, wheeling a suitcase out before him. He had a travel bag slung over his shoulder, then hoisted a large backpack on top of the case. He took his key to 4A off the key ring and placed it for the last time in the bowl on the table, next to the door. Just like thousands of other times, except, this was the last.

Putting his hand on the doorknob, he looked around at the living room and into the kitchen. He smiled sadly to himself as he could almost hear the voices of six wonderful people laughing and joking and sharing many good times. Then he heard his own voice joining in. He grabbed the back of his neck and sighed deeply. He closed the door. It clicked shut and he was out, with no way to re-enter on his own. He stood facing door and a tear escaped from his eye. He wiped it away and turned around.

Apartment 4B. He stood there a full minute just looking and thinking about the moments, precious moments he spent there. And who he spent them with. Leaving his bags close to the stairs, he walked to the door. He put the palm of his left hand flat against the metal surface.

He said aloud to himself and to her: "Penny, I am so sorry for the hurt I've caused you-and the pain." Tears welled up in his eyes. "I will love you until the day I die." He removed his hand, then let it caress the identifying number plate "4B", turned and started to gather up his bags. The door opened and he spun around. She was standing there with tears in her eyes as well. In the smallest of voices she said to him "I know Leonard. I know.

"Then can't we try again? Can't we-". She shook her head no.

"We-I can't Leonard. I just can't." It was the saddest statement she had ever made in her life.

They were both crying in earnest now. Noiselessly, but crying nonetheless. She walked to him, put her arms around him and hugged him harder than she ever had. He head was on his shoulder. Her eyes were closed. He returned the hug, just as ardently.

"I love you Leonard" she said in a whisper as she broke away, walking backwards, away from him. Her hand was at her mouth. She turned and walked quickly to her door. She then stopped and turned around. She smiled sadly, whispered "goodbye" and went inside and softly closed the door. He was alone on the 4th floor landing.

After walking down the four flights of stairs and out into the parking lot, he placed his bags into the trunk of his car. He turned to look up toward the 4th floor windows. He put his head down and entered the vehicle. He turned the key to start it and the radio began playing the song on his phone at the point it stopped the last time he drove.

** "..I'd say I'm sorry but that won't do, the future's come unwound. Words I should have said to you are nowhere to be found." **

** "I threw away a chance like you, now you're nowhere to be found."**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2. A brief encounter and promising developments

**A/N: Thank you all so much for the reviews on Chapter 1. They are very much appreciated. Keep them coming both good and bad. Constructive criticism is always welcome.**

**I'm writing Raj at length here for the first time. Let me know if you think I have him yet. Also, a mini inspiration in this chapter comes from the late, great Dan Fogelberg's "Same Old Lang Syne". One more thing, I graduated from Enrico Fermi High School. Go Falcons!**

**Remember, I own nothing having to do with The Big Bang Theory!**

Things drifted along. One day ran into the next and before long a month had passed. They had not been in one another's presence since he left. Since the break. They were each the elephant in the room when a gathering of their group of friends occurred. He had not returned to 2311 North Los Robles Avenue, instead went to Raj's place or to the Wolowitz' apartment when they met. A quiet "Penny will be there" or "Leonard is stopping by" would be disclosed which allowed each to bow out to avoid any awkwardness.

Of course the inevitable happened. In of all places, a market. She was picking out some fruit and looked up to see a familiar head of curly brown hair wearing a black hoodie with grey sleeves, jeans and a pair of Converse All Star high top sneakers. She breathed in quickly, making the woman standing next to her look up at her with concern. She put down the tangerine she was looking at and turned around to leave. She stopped herself suddenly and turned around and decided to "rip off the band-aid" and approached him.

Swinging the basket holding items she had selected and hitting him gently in the leg she said "Hey you" quietly.

Hearing those two words, he turned quickly. The startled look changing slowly to a sad smile. "Hey" he replied.

She went to give him a hug, but she dropped her purse, some of the contents scattering on the market floor.

"Oh dopey me" she said with a laugh. Leonard laughed as well and put down the canvas bag holding his groceries to help her gather her belongings.

With her purse put back together and slung over her shoulder, she opened up her arms and said "let's try that again".

As they embraced he let go quickly and backed away. Looking at her with some concern he said "you've lost some weight."

"Um, yeah. I've been trying to eat a little better. Cutting down on the wine, you know turning a new leaf."

"Well don't over due it. You were…" he nearly said perfect, but caught himself. "You were fine the way you were."

She knew what he was going to say and blushed. "Thank you" she returned.

"Will that be all sir?" The woman behind the deli counter asked, handing him a package of sliced cheese.

"Yes. I'm all set. Thanks a lot."

"Anything for you Miss?" she asked Penny.

"No I'm good, thank you." They walked away from the counter together.

"How are you?" she asked him softly.

"I'm good, thanks for asking. And you, besides skinny?"

"Stop it" she smiled. "I'm well. Busy at work. You know, 'same old, same old.'"

He turned and put his hand on her arm. "Really. Is everything okay?"

She successfully fought back a tear and nodded her head and said "Yes" in a whisper.

She pulled out her cell phone and swiped it open. Looking at the clock she said "Yikes. Look at the time. I've really got to get going."

He nodded his head, saying, "I've got to go check out and get home myself. It was great to see you Penny."

"You too Leonard", reaching out to embrace him.

This hug lasted a little longer than the first. As they broke away, she put her hand on the side of his face, said goodbye, turned and walked away.

Later that afternoon, she was driving with Raj. He had stopped at Sheldon and Amy's to pick up some items that needed to be returned to the library. He had mentioned to Sheldon that he was bringing a display of the solar system to the children's department as part of the astrophysics department ongoing mentoring and outreach program with the city. Jumping at the chance to avoid paying a fine for anything brought back overdue, he talked Raj into stopping by. He met Penny as they were both entering the building. She volunteered to go along for something to do.

Raj loaded Sheldon and Amy's library returns into the back seat. He turned around to see Penny stretching. Her arms were straight up over her head. She then bent at the waste and placed her hands flat on the ground.

"You are very bendy" Raj commented.

"Thanks Raj. My back has been killing me lately and when I stretch like this it usually brings some relief, but not so much right now."

She stood up and twisted her trunk, shrugged her shoulders and got into the car. Raj noticed her wince.

"Are you alright? Are you sure you want to go?"

"Yeah, yeah. My back is just a little stiff. I'll be okay. Let's go!"

As Raj pulled out into traffic, she said "Raj we are all so happy that you can talk with all of us now. It really is great that you can take part in everything, including the conversations without having to have a drink."

"Well thank you Penny. It really is good to be able to contribute fully to our group."

They drove on in silence until she said "I saw him today. I ran into him in the market."

"Oh" Raj returned. "And how did it go?"

"Raj it was so, so awkward." He nodded his head in support.

"There was so much I wanted to say to him; wanted to ask him. I was like a schoolgirl. I couldn't get anything intelligent out of my mouth. I was all blah, blah, blah. Pretty ridiculous."

"Penny, can I ask whey you two broke up?"

"You can ask, but I won't tell you. I'm sorry Raj. That's between Leonard and me."

"Did he cheat on you?"

"No! Why is that the first thing everyone asks. You know Leonard better than that!" She immediately looked down and put her hands in her lap. "I'm sorry Raj. I didn't mean to jump down your throat."

"That's okay Penny; and you're right. That is not like Leonard."

They were silent for a few minutes. Then Raj exclaimed "here we are!"

Penny smiled. Raj's inner geek was coming out. She laughed out loud, thinking about all the times Leonard had done the same thing.

"The outreach program is really making a difference for kids. Giving them exposure to science outside of the classroom."

"Maybe show them that science can be fun and even a little cool?"

"Exactly! Science is not just for geeks."

They both got out of the car laughing. Raj noticed that she winced again standing up. He didn't say anything.

They were met by a young woman exiting the building.

"Dr. Koothrappali!" She greeted Raj enthusiastically.

"Please Ms. Anderson, call me Raj."

"Well then you'll have to call me Elyse."

"Deal! Elyse, this is my friend, Penny."

Penny offered her hand along with a huge smile. "It is a pleasure to meet you Elyse."

"And you Penny. Do you work with Dr. Kooth-with Raj?"

"Oh no. I'm just a friend that came along for the ride."

Elyse's attention went back to Raj. "Were you able to bring the entire display in one trip?"

"Yes I was successful, although, you'll have to help me carry it in and put it together."

"I'll leave you both to it" Penny said. Giving a Raj a wink, she shook Elyse's hand again and said "I'll get Sheldon's returns and see you later on."

After making three trips from his trunk to the conference room that would hold the display Elyse said "you're girl friend is very cute."

"Penny? Oh no, she is just a friend. She was dating one of my best friends, but they separated recently."

"Oh, that is so hard and you are friends with them both" she said sympathetically.

"It is, but I have a feeling that they are not quite done with each other yet. There has always been something about the two of them. Hard to explain really, but there is something there that you don't see very often." Elyse nodded.

Penny dropped the returns off at the respective desks. She didn't realize she would have to make three different stops to return all the items. Sheldon and Amy had been quite busy at the library. They were returning books, a few movies on DVD along with some circulating periodicals.

Finishing up, she began to look at the notices on the bulletin board. One caught her eye.

** HELP WANTED:**

**LIBRARIAN'S ASSISTANT NEEDED WANTED 4 DAYS PER WEEK **

**(INCLUDING SATURDAY MORNING)**

**PART TIME (30 HOURS) TO START**

**OPPORTUNITY FOR FULL TIME AFTER REVIEW PERIOD**

**HEALTH INSURANCE AND VACATION PROVIDED**

**SEE MS. ANDERSON FOR DETAILS**

Penny looked at the add with her mouth open. She wondered if she had a chance at a position like that. It dawned on her that Ms. Anderson was Elyse and she was with Raj. She decided to ask about the position before they left.

After the display was completely assembled, Raj turned off the lights in the conference room and clicked the remote control he aimed at the display.

The display sprang to life with a holographic display of the solar system. "Raj this is beautiful!" Elyse said in a whisper."

For the next twenty-five minutes he ran through all the options with her. She repeated each step. He complemented her on how quickly she picked things up.

When the demonstration was over she put her hand on his shoulder and said "Raj I can't thank you enough. This will be wonderful for the children and for the program."

"I think it will be a boon for the library as well" Raj said and put his hand over his.

"That it will. Thank you again Raj. Clearing her throat, she said "well I know you need to get going and I need to see to a few things in the office. Shall we go find Penny?"

"Okay" Raj said with a smile.

They found Penny checking out a book at the counter. "Look Raj. A biography of Enrico Fermi!" she held up her find proudly.

"I read that. It is very interesting and explains a lot of what happened during the Manhattan Project."

"Two thumbs up from Dr. Koothrappali!" She then got serious. Elyse, I saw on the bulletin board the notice about the job for an assistant. Is the position still open?"

"It is Penny. Are you interested?"

"I really am. Can I make an appointment to come in to speak with someone about it?"

"You sure can and you will see me. How about Monday morning at say 11:00?"

"I'll be here. Thank you Elyse."

"My pleasure. We will see you then." Turning to the man beside her, she said "Raj, thank you so much again. The display is absolutely wonderful. It will open to the public the day after tomorrow. I hope you and Penny and any of your other friends will stop by."

"You can count on me" Raj answered, beaming.

"I'm sure I can get Amy and Bernadette and Howard to come" Penny replied. We'll also work on Sheldon" Penny piped in.

"I'll talk to Leon-oh. Sorry Penny." Raj caught himself, but not in time.

"No Raj. Ask him when you see him tomorrow at work. We can't hide from each other and meet by chance in the market forever. It'll be good for both of us."

"Okay. I'll ask him." Raj was happy at the thought of the entire group being together again.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Inklings

**A/N: Thank you all for the reviews, the follows and the favorites. They mean a lot to me. I don't have much to say about this chapter other than I hope you all like it. Keep the reviews coming. Don't be afraid to criticize. Every review means so much. Oh, and I do not own anything having to do with The Big Bang Theory…..**

Chapter 3: Inklings

The next day was Friday and true to his word, Raj sought out Leonard to ask him about going to the opening of the astrophysics' department display at the library.

"We are trying to get a little buzz going about it." Raj said as he walked down the corridor with Leonard and Howard.

"Bernadette and I will be happy to go to give you some support Raj. Count us in!"

"Thank you Howard. You both will enjoy what we will be showing. The hologram equipment is brand new and is really impressive."

Leonard added "It sounds like a fun night out Raj."

Raj stopped walking and turned to look directly at Leonard.

"Leonard. Penny will be there. We talked yesterday and she-well she sounded like she wanted you to come" Raj stretched the truth just a little.

"Did she tell you that we ran into each other yesterday?"

"Yes. Yes she did."

"That must have been awkward" Howard added.

"Not as bad as it could have been" Leonard said looking down. "We didn't have a lot to say to each other."

"Well there will be plenty of people there. It won't be like you'll be one on one. We'll all be there-well not sure about Sheldon, Penny and Amy are going to try to convince him."

"I'll be there."

Later, Penny read Raj's text: "**HW & I spoke with LH. Will be there tmorrow**."

She caught herself smiling. She wondered what the news really meant to her. She had to admit, she was happy and a little nervous. She was looking forward to speaking with him. She wanted to tell him about the interview for the librarian's aid position.

Leonard made his way back to his lab after speaking with Howard and Raj. He would be seeing her again. And soon.

The event had been scheduled to begin Saturday at 6:00. A good crowd had started to arrive at 5:40. Raj was beaming and excited about the turnout. He wasn't even nervous about the brief remarks that Elyse had asked him to make. He had asked her opinion of what he would say. She gave him a glowing review.

Leonard walked in at 5:50. It had been awhile since he had arrived at this sort of function on his own. Usually he would enter with one or more of the guys. Or with Penny. Since he had moved to the duplex on Monterey Street, it didn't make sense for him to drive over to North Los Robles, or for them to drive to him.

Searching the crowd, he saw several familiar faces from the university. Barry Kripke was there. He wondered what reaction that would elicit from Sheldon. He then wondered if Penny and Amy had been able to convince him to attend. Leslie Winkle was over in a corner with some other people from the physics department. She smirked and waived at him playfully. He gave a nod of his head in return. Just then, his eye fell upon his group of friends. Howard was walking toward him. Bernadette was waiving enthusiastically. Raj lifted a bottle of water to him in salute.

"Hey Leonard. Glad to see you. Come on over we've all been waiting for you."

"Thanks Howard. Have you been here long?"

"Well we came with Raj in a caravan. We've been here since probably 5:15. We help set up some of the tables and chairs. Sheldon helped Raj tinker with the display."

"Oh." Leonard didn't know what else to say.

"C'mon" Howard said. They walked together toward their friends.

She looked at him as he came to them. He looked back, each of them not taking their eyes off the other. She was holding a glass of red wine. He smiled to himself, remembering she had suddenly begun to prefer cabernet. She was dressed in a simple black dress not too short, coming just to her knee. He smiled again that she was wearing a pair of elegantly dressy flip-flops. No heels.

She noticed that he was smiling at her as he approached. She smiled back and gave him a wave. "He's checking me out" she thought. Her smiled broadened.

His smile faded as he noticed how the dress seemed to hang on her and how gaunt her face looked. He turned quickly so he was no longer facing her, or the group. He touched Howard on the arm to stop him.

"Howard. How is she?"

"Penny? I don't know. She seems to be fine. Maybe a little quieter than usual. Why?"

"No. I mean her health. Has she been well? Don't you think she's lost weight?"

"Leonard, I'm a married man. I don't pay attention to those sort of things anymore."

"Yeah. Right."

"Seriously Leonard. She seems hale and hearty as far as I know. Bernadette hasn't mentioned anything. I don't know what else to tell you buddy. If you're worried about her, put on your big boy pants and ask her."

"I'm sorry Howard. I'm sure I'm over reacting."

"Over reacting to what?" Sheldon said as the two arrived to where their friends stood.

"I told Leonard I thought his hair was getting too long." Leonard was relieved that Howard thought of that answer quickly.

"Yes now that you mention it Howard, he is a little shaggy." Sheldon came back just as quickly.

"Sheldon!" Amy exclaimed. "You should give you former roommate a nicer welcome than that."

"I'm sorry. Hello Leonard. Other than needing a haircut, how are you?"

"Fine. Thank you for asking Sheldon. How are you and Amy fitting in with each other?"

"Amazingly well Leonard." Amy answered brightly. "Sheldon has only amassed a minimal amount of fines for transgressions under our new roommate agreement!"

While the rest of the group smiled and Sheldon scowled, Leonard was nearly speechless.

"Amy. You are absolutely brilliant."

"Yes. Before I signed his roommate agreement, I had some counter proposals to make."

"I wish I thought of that. Great job!" He continued; "Bernadette. Great to see you." He received an enthusiastic hug from the shorter blonde.

"Raj." The two old friends shook hands warmly. "This is a great turnout. You must be pleased."

"I am. I am Leonard. This will be great for the library and will also provide some good press and publicity for the university. A win/win." He motioned to a young woman, who was standing quietly next to him.

"Leonard, this is Elyse Anderson. She is the director of the library and was instrumental in getting the outreach program started."

She shook Leonard's hand warmly and said "Dr. Hofstadter, it is so nice to meet you at last. All your friends speak highly of you.

"I have them all completely brainwashed-and please call me Leonard."

Then all eyes followed him as he stood before Penny.

"Hey you" she said. They gave each other a per functionary hug.

He was about to say something when Elyse said "well Raj, time to get the ball rolling."

"Okay. We're on!" Elyse took Raj's arm as they walked to the small stage set up at the far end of the room.

"Am I seeing something there?" Leonard asked as they walked away from the group.

"Oh Yeah!" Penny exclaimed. "There is a huge spark on both sides-trust me. I couldn't believe it when I saw them together here the other day. I'll fill you in later. Let's get closer to the front." She led him forward.

Elyse began. "Hello everyone. Thank you all for coming. We are so excited to see this wonderful turnout for our community outreach program. I would like to take this opportunity to thank CalTech University and especially the Astrophysics Department and Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali. They have donated both time and equipment for this section of our program and especially money. We have received a rather generous donation to help in keeping the program going forward. This month our theme is 'You and the Universe'. Before the actual program begins, Dr. Koothrappali has a few words for us. Dr. Koothrappali?"

Raj approached the podium at the front. The group in front of him numbered somewhere in the neighborhood of one hundred fifty people. He thought he would be extremely nervous, but he looked at Elyse. She was smiling at him, then winked. He smiled back, took a deep breath and began his remarks.

After his seven minute opening, the crowd applauded and the program began. He arrived back with his friends. They mobbed him like he was a rock star. Penny, Amy and Bernadette squealed like fan girls and hugged him enthusiastically. The guys ruffled his hair, slapped him on the back and told him how proud they were. Raj's eyes however were fixed on Elyse. She mouthed "great job". He beamed.

Two hours later, the event was drawing to a close. It was a huge success. More than a few people spoke with Elyse about becoming donors for the outreach program and to the library in general. Raj continued to receive numerous congratulations and positive reviews from many.

Howard and Bernadette invited the group and Elyse back to their apartment to continue the good times. All accepted.

Penny approached Leonard and asked if he could drive her their. She had arrived with Amy and Sheldon, but said she had something she wanted to talk to him about.

"Uhh, sure. I'd be happy to" Leonard answered, trying not to appear at all enthusiastic.

"Wait here. I'll go tell Amy, then we'll go."

They walked to his car talking about Raj and Elyse. Penny filled him in on what she witnessed when she went with Raj to deliver the equipment. They both smiled thinking about the new couple.

They got to the vehicle. Leonard pushed the button on the key fob to unlock the door. He opened it for her and held the door while she got in. He immediately noticed her sharp intake of breath and her wince as she sat down. He squatted down and taking her hand he said:

"What is going on with you? You've lost a lot of weight-and don't tell me about dieting. Just now it looked like a knife went through you. Penny what is it? Are you alright?"

"Leonard, stop it. I'm fine. I don't know what to tell you about my weight. I promise I'll pay more attention and if I need to, I'll make an appointment with a doctor. I promise, okay?"

"Okay. What was with the wincing when you sat down?"

"I've just had a sore back the last few days. I had been on my feet a lot at work. I just picked up some new shoes. I'm sure that will make a big difference.

"Good" he said and walked around to the driver's side of the car and got in.

Penny looked at him and began with a sigh.

"I wanted to talk to you about an opportunity that kind of fell into my lap."

"Sure. You know you can talk to me about anything." She put her hand on his arm as he started the car.

She went on to tell him about the position and that she would be speaking to Elyse about it on Monday.

"That sounds great. You would be finally free of the Cheesecake Factory. Is this something that you really want?"

"Do I want to be away from the Cheesecake Factory? Yes. Do I want to be a librarian? I'm not sure."

"What about acting?"

"I know. As a waitress I would have more flexibility on hours. At the library, the schedule may be a little more-I don't know-structured. It may be harder to go on auditions."

"Well, it sounds like you'll be working only three of the five weekdays, if you're going to work Saturdays. That may offer some flexibility."

"True. And what if the acting never happens?"

"It'll happen Penny."

"Thanks bab-Thanks Leonard" she felt her face redden at nearly dropping 'baby' at him. "But you never know. I can always take some library science courses. There is an avenue of study toward that at the community college."

"Librarians are always in demand. Not only for the public, but private libraries as well." She listened intently. He continued; "information technology too. Everyone wants to know everything. A degree in information or library sciences would be very useful for anyone."

They were quiet for a few miles. She finally said "so if I like what Elyse has to say, and she likes me, you think I should take it?"

"I don't want to influence you, but I honestly think it would be a good fit for you."

"Thank you Leonard. I really wanted to talk to you about this. I hope you didn't mind."

"No matter what Penny, you can come to me for anything , anytime. I'll always be here for you, no matter what" he repeated.

"I know Leonard. I know." She wiped away a tear. He looked over and saw it.

"What? What is it."

"Oh nothing. It's just-she shook her head. "I don't understand why Leonard" more tears now. She reached with her body across the counsel between the seats and rested her head on his arm.

"I'm sorry Penny."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: An interview and talking things out.

"Ugh! I cannot wear something like this!" Penny exclaimed looking in the mirror.

"Why not? You look great!" Bernadette countered.

"I look too much like-"

"PRIYA!" Bernadette and Amy said it together.

"Maybe if the suit wasn't that dark grey color?" Amy asked.

"Yeah. You need to try something beige. I never saw her wear beige. And maybe a suit with a skirt instead of pants. Do you think she had some horrible scars on her legs? We knew her for almost a year-Never saw her legs" Bernadette was laughing now. The other two joined in giggling.

The day after the library event Penny had called Bernadette and Amy to go shopping with her. She wanted to have something "professional" to wear for her interview with Elyse.

Mid-way through the Sunday afternoon, they found something that just fit the bill; and it was beige to boot. Penny tried it on with a blue blouse. Both friends agreed. "This was the one."

Together Amy and Bernadette planned to make the purchase for Penny as a good-luck gift. They also were not sure about the state of her finances and thought she could use the help. Penny cried and said "thank you, thank you both" and hugged her two friends.

Monday morning arrived. She was unnaturally calm and confident. She had slept remarkably well the night before. She woke only once during the night-again with the night sweats that had been interrupting her sleep for the last three weeks. She had the physical scheduled later that day after her interview at the library. Hopefully she would find a cause.

She had showered early and was waiting in her robe until it was time to get dressed and leave. Her phone buzzed with a text notification. She picked it up and smiled brightly. It was from Leonard.

**Good morning! Just wanted to wish you luck, even though you don't really need it. You will do great, I'm sure! Give me a call later on to tell me all about it. I'll be thinking of you all day ;) x**

She quickly typed back a reply.

**After a message like that I can't fail! Thanks sweetie. I'll call you tonight! XX**

She rested her head on the arm of the loveseat and smiled.

10:15 and she was ready. She looked at herself in the mirror and had to admit the beige suit looked great. Especially with the blue blouse. Leonard liked blue on her. She thought of the blue t-shirt with cap sleeves and flowers done the left side. She wore it the day they met and was hanging in her closet. She would keep it always. Shaking her head to snap her out of her day dream, she got up, gathered her purse, keys and cell phone. It was time to go.

She had arrived early at the library and walked slowly toward the building. She introduced herself to the young woman sitting at the reception desk in the library's office wing. She showed Penny to a small conference room and was told Elyse would be there presently. A short time later, Elyse entered and greeted her brightly.

"So good to see you again Penny. I hope you weren't waiting long."

"Not long at all Ms. Anderson. Thank you so much for the opportunity to speak with you."

"Penny. We kind of know each other. It would be too awkward for you to call me Ms. Anderson. In fact none of the other candidates did."

"I'm sorry Elyse. I just didn't want to sound too familiar. I also guess I'm a little nervous."

"Why don't we just relax and talk like old friends, alright?"

"Alright" Penny said smiling.

Elyse began and explained the position. They were looking for someone on an entry level. They didn't even really care about prior job history. The thought was they could take someone 'fresh' and mold them into what they wanted.

The job at first would be mainly in the children's department. She would work on furthering the programs in place and also assist the director, Elyse, in developing new programs going forward. Penny listened earnestly as Elyse went through the various responsibilities. Penny felt quite at ease with her. They seemed to get along very well.

After the outline and explanation of the position and expectations associated therewith, Elyse asked Penny if she had any questions. They spent the next thirty minutes on this. Elyse thought that Penny brought up a lot of good points and asked some great questions and had a few valid concerns. Elyse smiled. Raj was right. This woman had a good head on her shoulders and a lot of common sense. She had to admit, her mind was nearly made up.

They finished up with the interview and Elyse showed Penny to the reception area and her secretary, Glynnis, the young woman Penny had spoken with on her arrival. Penny and Elyse shook hands warmly. "We have one other party to interview, hopefully tomorrow and then should be able to make a final decision by the end of the week." Penny nodded.

"Glynnis will have you fill out an application, that will include your contact information and some references for us to follow up with. Then you'll be all set."

"Thank you again for taking the time to speak with me Elyse. I enjoyed our talk."

"As did I Penny. We will be in touch soon". The shook hands again in a farewell. Elyse looked directly into Penny's eyes, nodded and turned and went back into her office.

Penny walked quickly to her car. She unlocked the door threw her purse onto the front seat and hopped in. She gripped the steering wheel breathed in deeply and screamed "YES! YES! YES!" She then shook her head and smiled, started the car and drove off toward her doctor's appointment.

Later, she sat in 4B. In the dark, alone. With a lot on her mind. The only light came from her cell phone. She had it opened to her contacts, scrolling through her friends. She had them pose for pictures waiving. That way when her phone rang, or if she called them, their picture would appear as if they were already saying "hello". She thought it was incredibly cute.

Alphabetically, Sheldon's picture was the first of her close friends. His arms were crossed and his head was tilted. One finger was lifted-his concession of a wave.

Next was Amy's photo. It featured a broad grin and a quickly (and blurred) waving hand. She could almost hear her saying "hi Bestie!" enthusiastically.

She skipped over what would be the next contact and came to Raj. Instead of a wave he gave his "two thumbs up" with a smirk.

Bernadette had her finger pointing at a dimple with a cute little finger-wave; Howard gave a simple salute.

Her best friends saying "hello".

She scrolled up to the one she skipped. This one was different. It wasn't just a picture of him. It was a picture of them. They were sitting on the stairs going up to the 5th floor just outside the door to her apartment. His arm was around her shoulders, gripping her near her bicep. She was wearing a black blazer and black jeans with a pale green v-neck t-shirt. He had a teal Henley shirt on. Several buttons were undone (so sexy, she sighed) and his sleeves were pushed up his forearms. He wore jeans with holes in the knees. Her left arm was wrapped around his right knee. Her right hand gripped her left. It was millimeters away from his right hand. She remembered just before Howard snapped the picture his forefinger was caressing her knuckle. She was leaning into him, her head against the side of his face. She wore a look of pure bliss.

She caressed him on the screen. Her finger then drifted down and pressed "call".

It rang three times before he picked up. "Hey" he said.

"Hi" she replied. "I'm not calling too late am I?"

"Never. You know that."

"Thanks."

"Well, how did it go with Elyse?"

"It went so well Leonard. It seems like it will be so fun and interesting. I would be working a lot with children." She got enthused all over again. "I'd be working with Elyse a lot at first then as time went along and if I do alright, I'm sure, they would be leaving me alone to maybe even start some programs on my own."

"When will you know?" he asked, sharing her enthusiasm.

"It may be a soon as Wednesday. They have one more person to interview and then they will be making their decision. I think there are four of us in the running."

"Hey" she said, continuing her excitement. I bought a suit. You should have seen me!"

"Well tell me about it. Draw me a picture."

She smiled broadly and said, "well it was beige and it had a skirt, NOT slacks, like-well not slacks.

He chortled, because he knew exactly what-and who she was alluding to.

"I heard that, you" she said playfully. "Now stop it!"

"What. I didn't say anything" he said in mock horror.

"Anyway" she continued. "The skirt wasn't too short or too long-know what I mean?" She didn't wait for a reply. "It had a cute 'kick-pleat' in the back, and well-it looked real nice on me if I do say so myself."

"I'm sorry I missed it."

She took a chance and said "I, um. I still have it on."

Silence.

"Leonard. I miss you so much." She didn't give him a chance to answer.

"I miss you. I miss seeing you every day. I miss the way you tease me. I miss the way I can make you smile. I miss your smell. I miss having dinner with you. I miss how you make me laugh. I miss how you look at me." Her voice was getting hoarse. He knew she was crying.

"What I miss most is your touch. The way you hold me after we make love. I miss your hands on me."

"I miss you too Penny." he said softly.

"What are we going to do Leonard? What'll I do?"

"You can let me love you."

"We need to talk."

"Do you want me to come there?"

"I don't think we need to share things with people just yet."

He wondered at that reply and said "How about the coffee shop on Colorado?"

"It's 8:30 now. See you at 9:15? Is that enough time for you to drive over here?"

"More than enough."

She hit "end call" and put the phone in her purse.

"I have to figure out how I'm going to tell him" she said to herself out loud.

She was waiting for him when he arrived at the coffee shop. She waived when she saw him come in. He walked over to her. She stood up slowly and gingerly.

"Are you alright?" There was great concern on his face and in his voice.

"Oh, yeah, yeah. It's just my back again. I'm fine. Really."

They hugged. She pulled back and kissed him lightly on the lips.

"I've got some green tea here. Can I get you something?"

"Why don't you sit down and relax. I'll go get something." He started to walk toward the front counter. He turned suddenly and looked at her standing in front of him.

"You're right. That suit is fantastic!" he exclaimed.

She curtseyed and with her arms spread wide as she twirled around. He laughed, then went to get his coffee.

They chit-chatted for awhile. She filled him in more as to what happened in the interview and what she expected if she was to make a change in her career. He listened attentively.

"It sounds like you've made up your mind if you receive an offer."

"Not to jinx myself, but I think I have" she said smiling. He returned the smile warmly.

She then turned serious. "Leonard." she stopped and took in a deep breath and started again. "Leonard, I need you in my life." Her expression was blank. He couldn't read her.

"This is the last time I want to talk about this" she said. Her voice was shaking. She reached out for his hand. She caressed his thumb with hers.

"What happened when you were away, I-well I need to know that you respect me. On some level, I understand in a way. I think you were probably proud and wanted to-" tears were in her eyes. In his as well.

"-you wanted to show me off. But Leonard you are _not_ like that. I know it in my heart of hearts that you aren't. I don't know if you were drunk, or-I just don't know. Look at me. Tell me that you love me and that something like that will never, ever happen again. If you tell me, I'll believe it and we will never speak of it again."

"Penny. You are my life. You are the beginning and the end for me. There is nothing else-no one else has ever inhabited me here" his hand went to the middle of his chest, over his heart. "You have to know that. You have to know how much I love you. You are everything to me. I lost myself out there. You are my compass and without you there I-"

She jumped up and threw her arms around him, kissing him deeply.

"I love you Leonard Hofstadter". She tapped his lip with her finger, sitting in his lap in the middle of a coffee shop with a host of people looking at them. Penny sheepishly looked around, cleared her throat and slid off his lap returning to her chair, but moved it as close as she possibly could next to his.

She grabbed her purse and got out her phone. She slid the bar to unlock it and hit contacts and scrolled as she had earlier. When she got to the picture of the two of them sitting on the stairs, she held it up to him saying "remember this?"

"I do." he answered smiling. "My favorite."

"Mine too. I sent it to Howard in a text. I asked him to make me some copies in larger sizes. I want to hang it on the wall in my bedroom. Would that be alright?"

"A big picture of me and you hanging on the wall in your bedroom? That is definitely alright."

They sat there a bit longer. She finally said "so I had an appointment with a doctor today after the interview."

**A/N: So I caved a little here. I hope this explains things a little. **

**I was listening to the song "Mercury" by Rod Picott and the great Amanda Shires and heard the line "your hands on me" and had to fit it in here. Kind of neat to tell you the obscure places things are found. I'll try to do it more (if you care, if you don't just say "enough with the wacked out references already"). **

**Thank you all so much for the reviews follows and things of that sort. They are very much appreciated, so keep them coming. It is 11:03 p.m. Eastern Daylight Time on the east coast of the U.S. That means less than nine days to go to the season 7 premiere. What better time to say I own absolutely nothing to do with The Big Bang Theory. Thank you all!**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Admissions

**A/N: This is a little short and for some reason it was a little difficult to write. Not sure why, but it didn't flow like most of the rest of this has so far. I have a lot of this written already and have thought much of it through-not the case with this chapter. Less than a week before season 7 begins and sorry to say I'm a little nervous about things I've been hearing, but It's only a television show and que serra, serra. **

**Thank you all who have reviewed already. I hope you continue to do so. I really, really appreciate each and every review and follow. As always, I own nothing having to do with the Big Bang Theory. Thanks for reading!**

Leonard waited a beat and turned to her. Taking both of her hands in his, he looked at her and said "Penny, what is going on with you? Talk to me."

She sighed deeply. "Well you know about the back problems. Always in my lower back. It doesn't come at any particular time." He nodded.

"Then the weight loss. I fibbed a little to you on that one-I'm sorry. I haven't really been dieting, so there's that." A look of fear and concern swept over his face.

She took off the suit jacket, turned and draped it over her chair. She continued "There are a couple of things I haven't told you; I've been waking up during the night, sweating. Really sweating a lot. That's what made me go today."

"What did the doctor say?" he asked quickly.

"He really didn't say anything. He examined me. Asked me a ton of questions; you know about life-style, what sort of things were going on in my personal life." She raised her eyebrows and shrugged her shoulders at that.

"I told him that I was having some difficulty in a relationship. He didn't think that had anything to do with what is going on, except for maybe the weight loss. He scheduled me for some tests later this week. On Friday."

"I'm coming with you." He said. She nodded.

"Thank you" she answered softly.

"You mentioned 'a couple of things'. What else?"

She looked around the coffee shop. Not may people remained. She then lifted her left arm and took his left hand with her right. She brought it to a spot under her arm.

"There was this. I've never noticed it. He did during the examination."

Leonard was startled. He felt the swelling.

"Did he mention to you what this could be?" He asked the question. He almost hoped the doctor didn't; that he just told her that he'd like to do some tests to rule some things out. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

She nodded and whispered "Hodgkin's".

Even though he had thought the same thing, the word hit him like a lightening bolt. He went numb for a second, but recovered for her. She didn't see what flashed across his face, or know what went through his mind.

"Let's get out of here" he said.

They both stood. He took her jacket and helped her on with it.

He walked her to her car. Taking her keys, he unlocked the door and opened it for her. He held her hand to help her into the driver's seat.

"That was very gallant of you" she said teasingly. He bowed and handed her back the keys.

Getting serious again, he said "I'm parked just up ahead. I'll follow you back." She nodded her head and he closed the door.

Many thoughts went through his mind as he followed her back to North Los Robles. A question that he was afraid to ask, but had to nonetheless.

She was also lost in her thoughts as she drove home. She smiled at the reconciliation. She was not going to think of anything beyond that.

When they got to the parking lot for number 2311, She waited in her car for him. He had parked in his old spot. Since moving in, Amy preferred to park closer to the building than Leonard had.

She gave him a little waive as he approached her car. She got out and they began walking toward the building. She put her arm through his and leaned her head on his shoulder.

Leonard was surprised by the butterflies he felt as he entered his old building. He hadn't been back since the break and tried his best not to think about the day he left. Hopefully that was behind him. He would have his answer soon.

As they reached the landing of the 4th floor, Leonard glanced at the door to apartment 4A. As if on cue the door swung open. Amy appeared.

"Well hello you two" Amy said smiling broadly.

"Hi Amy" they both said it at the same time.

"Okay then. Well have a good night. Good to see you Leonard." She winked at Penny and closed the door.

"That was quick" Leonard said.

"Yeah, well she's got to go tell Sheldon and text Bernadette, Howard and Raj."

"Good point" he said.

He took her keys again and unlocked the door for her. He pushed it open to let her in.

"Are you coming in?" she asked tilting her head to one side.

"Penny. What's going to happen with us?" Is this because you're afraid of what you're going to find out on Friday?"

"Good question. But it's not. That is not what this is about" She said firmly.

Continuing "I decided after the event at the library that I wanted to talk to you like we did earlier and if I heard what I wanted-Well if I heard what I wanted, I would throw myself at you and hope for the best. Come in. Please?"

He entered and closed the door behind him.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and looked into his eyes. "I've missed this. I really have." She then kissed him three short kisses, pulled her head back and nodding her head yes said "my Leonard" and pressed her mouth to his before he could answer.

Her tongue entered his mouth, searching until it found it's target-his. He reciprocated. As they kissed, she walked him backwards toward her bedroom. They bumped against the bed and she both pushed him over and fell along with him. They broke away for a moment and he saw the tears in her eyes. He touched the side of her face. He said "I love you."

She answered "I know" like she had once before, but this time she added "and I love you."

They each poured all of the love and passion they had for each other into the lovemaking. They left nothing behind.

Afterwards they talked. And talked. About nearly everything. The only subject not broached was what would happen on Friday.

Leonard brought it up first. "The swelling of the lymph nodes doesn't necessarily have to mean-well, that." He didn't want to say that word aloud. "It could be some sort of infection. Maybe a virus. You'll have a few different kinds of tests that will explore what's going on and rule out anything that it _isn't_." She nodded her head in understanding.

"I'm just happy that you are going with me. You don't mind?"

"Just try to keep me away!"

She smiled at him and moved in closer into his side. She kissed him deeply again. She then flipped over. He wrapped his right arm around her. Their hands instantly found each other and their fingers intertwined.

"Welcome home" she said quietly before she drifted off to the most peaceful sleep she had in weeks.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: The restraint of Amy Farrah Fowler; a meeting; and 48 Monterey Street

**A/N: This is a fill-in sort of chapter. The next update will be a little more meatier, more happening. Thank you to everyone who is reading. I appreciate your attention and really enjoy reading your reviews. Keep them coming. A huge thanks and shout out to the amazing Tensor. He provided some valuable advice and insight yesterday. As always, I own nothing having to do with The Big Bang Theory. Thanks!**

Amy simultaneously knocked lightly on the door to apartment 4B and sent a group text to them both.

**Good morning. It's me, Amy. I'm at you door!**

"What time is it" Penny moaned after hearing both phones chime the notice of an incoming message.

"5:45" Leonard answered.

"What the hell?"

"Its Amy. She says she's at the door. I'll get it." Leonard swung his legs over and pulled on his pants and his t-shirt, discarded blissfully last night next to the bed.

Shuffling off to the living area, he looked through the peep-hole. Amy was there. She appeared to be fully dressed. He opened the door to let her in.

"Good morning Leonard. Is my Bestie still sleeping?"

"She's trying Amy. Is everything alright?"

"Oh yes. Everything is just fine. Now." She elbowed Leonard softly in the ribs and smiled.

Leonard grinned sheepishly. "Is there something you need? Something Penny or me can do for you?"

"Oh no. I'm sorry. I should get to the point." Leonard nodded.

"I just wanted to let you know that I didn't tell anyone about seeing-well about seeing you both together last night."

"Are you sure you didn't just want to see if I was still here?" Leonard asked. The grin still on his face.

"No. I can see the parking lot from our living area window. Your car is there plain as day. " Leonard laughed at this response.

"I came over early to make sure you were awake so that you could avoid Sheldon."

"What's going on?" Penny asked bleary eyed, coming out of the bedroom, tying her robe around her.

"Amy wanted to let us know that she didn't mention seeing us to anyone."

"Whoa. Thanks Ames."

"No problem Bestie. Leonard should get the show on the road. It is nearly 6:00 and Sheldon will be rising soon."

"She does have a point" he said to her. She nodded her head in agreement. She walked to him quickly and wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.

When they broke he went into the bedroom to finished getting dressed.

"I really thought that this would be all over the place by now."

"Trust me. It was hard, but I thought I'd wait to talk to you first" Amy replied.

"Well, thank you Amy. We appreciate it." Penny said softly, putting her hand on Amy's shoulder, which made her light up like a firefly.

Just then Leonard came out of the bedroom, ready to run home to get ready for work.

"I can't believe the word hasn't gotten out yet" he said smiling at Penny. He turned to Amy, who still had the joyful expression on her face.

"Thank you Amy" he said simply and walked over and swept her up in a huge hug. This surprised her, but she returned the embrace. When he released her he smiled at her and nodded his head. The show of friendship from Leonard was not usually displayed and she smiled back, shaking her head as if to say 'it was nothing' and shrugged her shoulders.

He turned back towards Penny. She said "I work 10:00 to 5:00." Call me later?" He nodded as she kissed him again." He looked deeply into his eyes. His gaze was returned. He touched her face, then turned and as he walked by Amy, he put his hand on her shoulder, smiled one last time and left.

"Do you want me to go so you can go back to bed?" Amy asked.

"No. I'm pretty much wide awake now. Want some coffee?"

"Sure."

Penny busied herself in the kitchen. Amy came and sat at one of the stools near the counter.

"So?" Amy asked expectantly.

Penny turned around and looked at her friend. She smiled shyly and nodded her head yes.

"Oh Penny!" Amy yelled and ran around the kitchen counter and enveloped the waitress in a huge hug. "I'm so happy for you. You've been so sad; so blue."

Amy pulled back with her hands on each of Penny's arms. She looked into her eyes and said "you are. You're back. I can see the little sparkle back in those beautiful green eyes. I'll bet Leonard saw it too!" Penny blushed.

Just then, three quick knocks were placed on the front door followed by "Penny and Amy". Another three knocks and again "Penny and Amy". And once again three knocks and the final "Penny and Amy."

"Its open. Come in Sheldon" Penny called out.

"It's a little early for you hens to be cackling, isn't it?" he remarked.

"I saw my Bestie coming home last night, so I thought it would be good to have an early morning gab session over some coffee" Amy explained, hoping Sheldon would buy it.

"Well just so long as you are ready to drive me to work at the appointed time" he replied.

"As you can see, I'm all set. Lunches are made and waiting in the refrigerator. I believe the only thing not ready, is you Sheldon!"."

"You made my lunch?"

"Just the way you like it Pookie!" Penny burst out laughing.

"Amy Farrah Fowler! I've told you I don't like that name" he whined back to her.

"Nevertheless, you need to be ready on time so I won't be late."

He stood there for a moment with his mouth open. "Very well Amy. I will be ready on time." He turned to leave the apartment, turned and nodded his head "good day, Penny."

"Bye Sheldon" she replied, stifling another laugh.

"I don't believe what I just saw!" Penny exclaimed.

"Oh, I have observed the goings on over the years between Sheldon and Leonard. I made the decision that this is going to be more of a two-way street."

"Well as a certain theoretical physicist once told me, 'well played'".

The two chatted on for another hour-and-a-half about every subject under the sun, well nearly every subject.

Penny then said: "Thanks again for not mentioning that Leonard and I are back together to everyone. Would you mind holding off a little longer?"

Amy's brow was furrowed and she replied "no. That's fine. Are you sure that everything is okay? That you two are really back together?"

"Oh yes! Yes!" she exclaimed. "Don't get the wrong idea. I just want to talk to him and then sit down with everyone together. Maybe we can have a get-together at the end of the week?" She didn't want to call it a party, in case she had some additional news.

Amy smiled. She could still see that Leonard had brought the spark back to her friend, but then there was something else. 'Still one wall up' she thought; 'I'll just have to wait her out.'

"A weekend get-together. That sounds great. I'll prepare Sheldon and let you know later on."

Amy looked at her watch and stood up saying "I've got to get going. If he comes out prepared for the day and I'm waiting for him, completely ready, it will drive him absolutely crazy!"

Penny laughed yet again and stood with her. The two friends embraced. Penny said "thanks again for everything Amy."

"Anytime" the answer came back. "That's what Besties are for!" She smiled and left.

Penny looked at the time. 7:45. A little too soon to call Bernadette. She busied herself cleaning up the coffee dishes. She then went into the bedroom and picked up the clothes she wore yesterday, hanging the suit carefully in the closet, maybe she could wear it one or two more times before she needed to have it dry-cleaned. She placed the blouse and her undergarments in the hamper and made the bed. Looking around she thought 'very good' and went to take a shower.

The shower and other morning ablutions complete (hair, make-up for work), she saw the time was 8:30. Howard would have just left for work and Bernadette would have a few moments.

She found the number in the contacts on her phone. She smiled at the picture with

Bernadette poking at her dimple and smiling with a waive. She hit the call button.

"Good morning Penny! What gets you up so early today?"

"Believe it or not I've been up for hours. I had a coffee chat with Amy earlier."

"Well that's um…different."

"Yeah, but it was fun. I'm sorry you couldn't be here."

"Oh that's alright. I had my own little 'coffee chat' with Howie" she said with a giggle.

"Okay, you can stop right there. That's just a little too ewww for first thing in the morning." They were both laughing now.

Getting serious suddenly, Penny said "Bernadette, if you don't mind, can you give me the name of that attorney you and Howard saw when you did the estate planning thingy awhile back?"

Bernadette immediately said "why? Are you alright? Are you in trouble?"

"No, no. Nothing like that" came the answer back, quickly.

"Then why do you need a lawyer? Bernadette asked, her curiosity getting the better of her.

Penny was ready for that. "Well I got some papers from my dad. I just wanted to go over them with someone. That's all."

Bernadette came back with "Howard would be happy to look over anything for you. That way you can save some money on the legal fees."

"Oh no. I wouldn't want to burden him with anything. Besides my dad said he would help out with any kind of legal bills." She hated lying to Bernadette, but if the truth be told, her father would foot the bill if he knew what she wanted with an attorney. Most definitely.

She got the name and phone number from Bernadette. As it was now nearly 9:00, she made the call to the attorney's office. She wanted to see if she could perhaps make an appointment for later that day. She decided to take a half-day at work. Be there from 10:00 to 1:00, see the attorney, then have dinner with Leonard.

Hanging up the phone, she couldn't believe her luck. She could see the attorney that afternoon at 3:00. She could work a little later, probably until 2:30; go to the appointment, then see Leonard. 'Luck is with you today Penny' she thought to herself. 'Let's see how long we can keep it going.'

Taking out her phone she sent a text to Leonard:

**Hey, you! How about I come by tonight and we can have some take-out and talk xxx P**

She put the phone down and went to her bedroom, got a bag and packed two changes of clothes as well as some overnight toiletries.

Coming back to the living area with the bag packed, she dropped it on the love seat and walked over to the kitchen counter where she left her phone. She saw an incoming message from "Leonard" with the wonderful picture of them on the stairs.

**Sounds great! I'll pick up some Thai food at a great place near me. **

**The address is 46-48 Monterey Street x L**

She smiled, picked up her bag and dropping her phone into her purse, made her way out the door to a busy day.

Since it was a slow Tuesday, it was not a problem for her to leave early. She clocked out at 2:30 and changed her clothes in the employee ladies room. She made it to the attorneys office at 2:50 and they took her right away.

She explained to the lawyer exactly what she wanted to do. He was a kindly older gentleman-many years older than her father. His name was Herbert Isaacson. He nodded his head as she made each point and explained her plan. When she finished, he said "It really looks like you've put a lot of thought into this. He made some comments about what she wanted to do and helped her adjust some of her thinking, looking at some items in a different and frankly more clear way. By the time they were done, she was happy with what she and Mr. Isaacson had planned.

"Now it will take about a week to get everything in order for you to sign, maybe even as early as next Monday. Are you sure you don't want to wait until after you receive the results of your test on Friday?"

She answered "Well it won't really change a lot of what I want to do, I don't think, just maybe one or two items. So, yes I want you to do this, sooner rather than later."

"Very good Penny. For someone so young and may I add the stress you are under, you have made some very good decisions for yourself and the future. They shook hands. Mr. Isaacson opened the door of the conference room for her and walked her out to the reception area. They shook hands again and said their goodbyes.

He walked back to his office and considered the interview he just had. It was a part of the process to speak with people frankly in his area of the law. It was also necessary to listen and watch their reactions to be sure that a client wasn't being manipulated, or was making decisions under duress or against their will. Despite what the young woman he just met with was going through, she appeared to be acting in her own best interests. He smiled and began to make notes in his file for his assistant to get started on the documents required.

She found the address rather easily. 46-48 Monterey Street. She pulled her red cabriolet to the curb in front of the house. His car was there in the driveway on the right. Her heart rate increased. He was home. She got out of the car, wincing slightly as she stood. In one motion she closed the door and slung her purse over her shoulder. She went to the trunk to get her overnight bag. She took a deep breath and made her way up the path to the front porch. She looked up at the number over the doorway. "48". If you looked at it in a certain way, the 8 looked like a capital letter "B". She laughed out loud wondering if Leonard noticed that it kind of looked like 4B. She laughed again and said out loud "of course he did, and so did I. Still queen of the nerds….".

She took a deep breath, knocked on the door and took a step back. A few seconds later the door opened and he was in front of her. "Penny!" He exclaimed.

Before he could say another word, she said "did you ever notice that if you look at the 48 just right…" she directed a glance upward, making him come out of the door to look up with her. "that it looks like 4B?" She closed her eyes and thought "smooth opening line."

"You know what, I did." They both laughed. There. The ice was broken.

"Um come on in." He stepped back and held the door for her.

"I hope you don't mind, I brought an overnight bag….."

"Of course. I was going to ask you if you wanted to spend the night; just wasn't sure how to broach the subject." They both smiled nervously, yet dreamily at each other.

Looking around, she said "Oh Leonard. This is really nice. Very old, but a real home."

"Yeah. It is a lot different than Sheldon's place. An entirely different décor. I'm really enjoying it."

He gave her the tour. They were standing in the living room. It wasn't overly large. It had a couch and two large chairs along with a coffee table. There was a television set along with Leonard's stereo equipment. There was also two easels, each holding a white board. They were both filled with the now familiar "squiggly lines" she had see so often. There were a few bookshelves as well. They held some of the familiar volumes as well as some of the collectables he was so fond of. He caught her smiling.

Considering the age of the house, the kitchen was quite small. It was larger than hers and maybe even that in Sheldon and Amy's apartment. It looked like it was well equipped with updated appliances. There was also an island with a work area.

She followed Leonard upstairs, where there were three bedrooms. The master bedroom had its own bathroom attached and was quite large. The second bedroom was empty. "I need to get some furniture for this room." She nodded in agreement. There was a second bathroom in the hall between the two secondary bedrooms.

The final bedroom served as Leonard's office. There was a desk that had his laptop. Beside it was another table that held a larger computer monitor along with a printer. Yet another easel with a white board was against the wall next to the door. Another bookshelf again with books and collectables and figurines.

"Well that's it. Home sweet home." Leonard said. Penny followed him out of the office and down the stairs.

"It is really nice Leonard. You've done a good job decorating it. It looks like you."

"Thanks. There is still a little bit to do, but I'll get there."

Walking toward the kitchen he said "c'mon. One more thing for you to see and then we can eat."

She followed him into the kitchen. She hadn't noticed before, but there was a hallway off the kitchen that served as a mud room. There were attachments for a washer and dryer.

"Oh my God!" She exclaimed. "You can do you laundry here! No going up and down all those flights of stairs." He was grinning at her.

"I'm impressed. And jealous" she said shoving him on the shoulder.

"C'mon. One more thing."

There was a sliding glass door at the far end of the hallway. He opened it and she walked out. She gasped at what she saw. Half the yard was fenced in, making it separate from the neighbor's. It featured a patio, which had a table and six chairs around it. In the corner she saw a fire pit and a second patio area with additional seating.

"Oh Leonard. This may be the best part of the entire place. You could spend so much peaceful time out here!" She said it in a whisper. Awestruck.

On the table their dinner waited for them. There was also a bottle of wine along with two glasses.

He guided her to the table and held her chair. She smiled up at him as she sat down. He walked around her to his seat. He poured them both a glass of wine. They each held their glass up as he said "to second chances."

She smiled and clinking glasses, said "to the future". He nodded and repeated it back to her.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: A question, some decisions and an answer

**A/N: Such an enjoyable premiere night! I hope you all liked as much as I did...Thank you to all who have reviewed this story. I very, very much appreciate it. I hope you will continue to do so. Also, I own nothing having to do with The Big Bang Theory.**

He awoke with a start, instantly knowing something was wrong. He reached out for her, but he knew she wasn't there. Did he feel her get up? When he touched her spot, he noticed that the sheets were a little damp. Taking his glasses from the night stand he picked up his phone and swiped it open. The time read 2:43 a.m.

He made his way downstairs. She was not in the living room. Continuing into the kitchen, he found that was also empty. Panicking just a little, he decided to check the patio outside the laundry room.

Sliding the door open, he let out a breath of relief.

"I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" she asked softly.

He walked over to where she sat. "No. I just - well I got worried when you weren't there."

His eyes were beginning to adjust to the dark. He could see her reaching out her hand to him. Taking it with his right, he wrapped his left around her shoulders. She was drenched in sweat.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah. I just wanted to try to cool off a little."

"Is it usually this bad?"

"Pretty close. This is a little worse than usual. I didn't think about this when I asked to stay. I'm sorry, but your sheets are going to be covered in 'Penny sweat'."

"Is it like this every night?"

"Lately? Yes. Pretty annoying. I do laundry nearly every day now."

He gently tugged on her hands, lifting her up. He sat in the seat and pulled her onto his lap. She immediately snuggled her head into the spot between his neck and shoulder. His arm was around her waist, but they were now each holding both of one another's hands.

"I'm going to suggest something here." He said softly. She nuzzled into him to get as close to him as possible.

"I don't want an answer today or tomorrow. I just want you to seriously think about it."

She remained silent in his lap.

"Move in here. With me."

She sat up straight and looked at him. They could not see each other's features in the dark, but she knew what she would find if she could. The caring eyes of someone who was completely devoted to her.

"I will. I'll think about it."

"Okay then."

"Okay then." she echoed.

"Why don't we go back upstairs. This has been nice. I'm better, but morning is going to be here before you know it. Also, I won't have you playing with lasers while you're half asleep" she teased, causing him to laugh.

She slid off his lap, keeping hold of his hands and pulled him off the chair and back toward the house.

As they walked up the stairs, holding hands, he said "why don't you hop in the shower real quick? It'll make you feel better. I'll see you in a few minutes."

She nodded and gave him a hug as they entered the bedroom. She continued into the bathroom. He began to take the sheets off the bed.

By the time he was done making the bed, she had turned off the water. Gathering together the sheets he had just taken off the bed together, he hustled downstairs and put them into the washer, added the detergent and started the cycle.

He came back to the bedroom to find her sitting on the end of the bed. Looking up, she smiled at him with tired eyes. It was now nearly 4:00 a.m.

"You should have waited for me, I would've helped."

"No problem. I'm a very quick bed-maker."

"Well come on let's get a little more sleep. 7:00 is fast approaching for you." She went to stand and winced once more holding her back. He rushed to help her into the bed. Neither said a word.

It was 7:45 when she awoke. Leonard was standing with his back to her, putting items in his pockets that he had placed on his bureau the night before. She sat up in the bed, both arms reaching back, her palms flat on the bed.

"Good morning Dr. Hofstadter" she said sweetly, but with a tired voice.

Turning around he smiled and said "good morning to you!" She then reached out both arms, inviting him to her. He smiled harder and went to her, sitting on the bed and wrapped his arms around her.

"You should try to get some more sleep. Are you working today?"

"No. I have the day off! There are some errands I need to do and I want to start sooner rather than later.

Standing, he returned to the bureau and picked something up. He came back to the bed and sat with her again. Taking her hand, he released what he was holding into her palm. It was a key. He said "just so you can let yourself in and out when I'm not here."

She smiled and touched his face.

Clearing his voice, he asked her "will I see you tonight?"

Standing slowly, she said "how about I make you dinner here? I made some decisions yesterday that I want to talk over with you."

"Sounds ominous" he said warily.

"Not so much. So, how about it?"

"Sure. I'll see you after work" he said rising. She walked to him and put her arms around his middle and rested her head on his shoulder. He squeezed her, a signal that he had to go. She sighed and looking up at him closed her eyes and reached for a kiss, which was lovingly delivered.

"There's coffee waiting for you downstairs. Take it easy and we'll see you tonight."

"Let me walk you to the door at least!" she said playfully.

They walked downstairs together. Leonard picked up his bag, which he had placed near the door and slung it over his shoulder. Embracing again, they said their goodbyes. He smiled at her and left.

She busied herself, began to wash the dishes from their dinner the night before. She transferred the sheets from the washer to the dryer and headed upstairs to get herself ready for the day. As she entered the bedroom, she picked up her phone from the nightstand on the side of the bed she had slept on. There was a missed call from the Pasadena Public Library.

She sighed to herself. Something else to think about. She hit the callback button on the phone and waited for the answer. When the call was picked up, she gave her name and asked for Elyse Anderson.

"Penny!" Elyse exclaimed when she picked up the line.

"Good morning Elyse" Penny said in return. "I had a missed call from the library. Not sure if it was you or not, but I wanted to speak with you just the same."

"That was me Penny. Do you have some time to come in over the next few days? I'd like to speak with you about some things. We've made a decision that I think will make you happy."

This was one of the few things Penny had not thought about over the last few days.

"I'm free all day today" she replied finally.

"Well, it's what 8:30 now, why don't you stop by at around 10:45?"

"Okay. I'll see you then" Penny replied.

"Good. I'm looking forward to it. See you then." Elyse said and ended the call.

Penny briefly put her head in her hands. If they were going to offer her the position, and from the way Elyse spoke, it certainly seemed that way, Penny was going to have to tell them about what had happened at the doctor's office after her interview and what was going to happen on Friday.

Wearily she began to get ready to head back to North Los Robeles to change for another interview with Elyse.

She arrived at the library at 10:35. She sat in her car for a few minutes and then made her way to the building. She had called Leonard to let him know about the call. He advised her to just tell Elyse everything and let the chips fall where they may.

When she entered the administrative offices Glynnis, the secretary/receptionist welcomed her with a smile. "Hi Penny" she said cheerfully. "I'll let Elyse know you're here. Why don't you have a seat?" she motioned to the chairs set against the wall of the outer office. Just as she sat down, her phone signaled an incoming message.

**Stay calm and remember I love you xxx, Leonard**

She smiled at the message and typed

**Thanks! I love you so much. I'll call when I'm done xxx P**

She put her phone away and sighed. She didn't feel as perky as that text came out. She was very nervous about what was going to happen with Elyse.

Just then the door opened and she appeared and approached her.

"Penny so good to see you again and thank you so much for coming in on such short notice." She winked at her and motioned for her to follow her into her office.

Elyse held a chair for her and waited for her to sit before she walked around to the other side of the desk and took her seat as well.

She was about to begin when Penny interrupted.

"Elyse, I need to speak to you about a few things, well one thing really, that has happened since the interview."

"You haven't changed your mind have you?"

"No, no I have not. I'm not sure if you will feel the same way."

"Well now you have me worried" Elyse replied.

"What I need to speak with you about is in the strictest of confidence. The only person who knows anything about it is Leonard." Elyse nodded her head in agreement.

"Not even Raj, especially not Raj. I know that you have a working relationship with him…" her voice trailed off.

"Penny, as a friend you have me a bit worried now. What is it?"

"I've been having some issues recently, night sweats, soreness in my back. I've also been tired at odd times."

Elyse nodded with a look of concern on her face.

I didn't think anything of it, but people made comments. Long story short-I had an appointment after my interview with you and the doctor was concerned enough to send me for some tests. "

Elyse looked at the young woman. She noticed that her features had suddenly turned ashen. There was more she wasn't telling her.

"Penny, we are prepared to offer you the position of assistant librarian. It is completely my call as to who we hire and how they are to be used. I want you to know that as soon as we were done with our conversation on Tuesday I knew that you were the one I wanted for this."

Penny could now feel herself blush at the compliment. "Thank you Elyse, but I don't know if I can commit until I know what I'm up against."

"Then I'll wait." She said it simply. Penny looked at her in shock.

"I mean it Penny. You have passion and insight. When we talked about the future, particularly how the present and ongoing programs will impact children in the area and in the city, that sealed the deal. I'll definitely wait to see what your tests bring.

She then walked around the desk and stood in front of Penny. And I will not tell a soul, not even Dr. Koothrappali."

"Penny stood up and shook Elyse's hand warmly. Elyse then gave her a hug and returned to her desk and fished in a drawer. She pulled out a card and looked at both sides.

"Here. This is one of my old business cards. It has the business number, my cell phone number and my home number. The personal numbers aren't on the newer cards. Call me anytime. Tell Leonard he is welcome to call me as well. When do you go for the tests?"

"Um Friday" Penny answered trying to compose herself.

"Good. Call me on Monday, or drop in just to touch base. We'll go from there. Alright?"

Penny nodded her head in the affirmative. "Thank you so much Elyse. Beyond that, I'm speechless."

"Well don't even think about anything here until after Friday. Take care and good luck Penny."

She nodded and smiled as she left.

She walked so fast to her car, she was nearly running. Pulling out her phone, she swiped it open and scrolled to her favorite picture and hit "call".

"Leonard, Leonard" she shouted as soon as he answered.

"How did it go?" he asked.

"You won't believe it-she offered me the job. Despite what I told her about Friday, she still wants me Leonard!"

"That's my girl" he replied. She could hear his smile through the phone.

"Oh Leonard. You don't know how happy I am right this minute. I wish you were here so I could tell you face to face and give you the biggest hug."

"Just all the more to look forward to."

"You'd better believe it mister. No lollygagging around you get that cute little tushy home right after work."

Laughing he said "I'll be expecting the big welcome. See you tonight."

"I love you Leonard."

"I love you too Penny."

They each signed off.

The greeting was warm to say the least when Leonard got home. She was waiting for him with the front door open. When he pulled his car into the driveway she flew out the door and flung herself at him, kissing him passionately, giving any neighbor who was interested quite the show.

Penny had dinner waiting for him. Again, they ate outside on the patio. She had prepared lactose-free style lasagna along with a small salad and fresh bread she had picked up at the market.

Pushing away from the table he said "Penny this was great!"

"There's more if you want."

"I am so full I don't think I could eat another bite."

"Good" she said with a satisfied smile.

She began to gather together the dishes to bring them into the kitchen. He stood up to help her.

When they were done clearing and everything was washed and put away, she put her hand on his arm and said "why don't we go into the other room. I need to talk to you about some things that I've decided.

Leonard looked at her with a furrowed brow.

"C'mon. Nothing bad-I don't think anyway."

She poured them each a bottle of wine and followed him into the living room. They each sat on the couch, sitting sideways facing each other. She took both of his hands and looked deeply into his eyes, devouring every inch of his features. He smiled as she looked at him so intently.

"I went to see an attorney yesterday." He looked at her quizzically.

"He is an estate planning attorney that Howard and Bernadette used earlier." Leonard nodded, wondering where she was going with this.

"Unless you tell me you would rather I not, and I hope that you won't, I'm making you my emergency contact. I'm also giving you Power of Attorney for everything. Legal matters, health care decisions. All of it. I want you to be my health care representative and if it needs to be, the conservator of my person and my estate. Leonard, before you can say anything, I am absolutely serious. Despite anything that may or may not happen after Friday, this is something I want in place for the future."

"It looks like you've put a lot of thought into this."

"I've almost thought of nothing else" she replied.

"But why me? What about your dad?"

"Because you're here. Because you love me. Because I love you. Because it is what I want. It's you Leonard."

He nodded his head in agreement.

"Oh and one more thing. The answer to the question you asked me last night? Yes, I will move in here. With you."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond.

He felt himself coming out of the slumber. Squinting, he knew once again that she was not in bed with him. Leaning up on his elbows, he could see the blurry figure sitting across from where he lay. Reaching for his glasses and putting them on, he saw her.

"Good morning" she said softly.

"What are you doing over there?"

"I'm watching you sleep. It's been awhile since I've done that."

"It's been awhile since anyone has watched me sleep" he kidded her.

She was sitting in the rocking chair they had placed in the bedroom. One foot was on the floor, the leg slightly stretched out, the other was completely bent at the knee, the foot laying flat on the seat of the chair. A light from the hallway illuminated her. She had an elbow on the arm of the chair and her chin rested in that hand. Her blonde hair was down and messily (and sexily) falling past her shoulders. The other hand was wrapped around her shin. She wore one of his t shirts and nothing else.

Smiling she got out of the chair and walked back toward the bed. Pulling the shirt over her head and dropping it on the floor, she got under the covers and wrapped her left leg around his.

"What time is it?" he asked as he turned toward her.

"Just before 5:30" she answered back as she attempted to get closer to him. She began kissing him on his eyes, his forehead, his cheeks, all over his face, before settling onto his lips. She then said with her voice rising at the end to make it a question, "make love to me?" He answered by returning the kiss, passionately and rolling her onto her back.

6:20. They were both out of breath and completely spent. They were each on their side with an elbow supporting their heads, panting in sync and smiling at each other. He saw tears in her eyes, despite the smile and reached to brush them out of her eyes.

"What is it?" he asked, frowning a little.

"I don't know. This morning. Today. You looked so wonderful sleeping there. I got a little horny. I don't know."

"A little horny? I'd like to see you _a lot _horny."

"Stop it! Do you want me to list for you the times you've gotten me a lot horny? It will take awhile."

"Nice save" he said. They were both laughing now.

The laughter quickly died down, she said "The instructions they sent by email last night said not to take a shower, so you can go ahead if you want. I'll go down and make you some coffee and have it here for when you get out." He nodded his head in agreement.

As she went to stand up, he grabbed her and wrapped her up in a hug. Separating, she nodded her head and smiled at him. She got out of the bed, picked up his t shirt and placing it back on over her head, left the room.

Making coffee in the kitchen, she let her mind wander. She didn't want to tell him but she barely slept the night before. Thinking about the test and more fretfully, thinking about the results. She knew that he hadn't slept well either. She had felt him tossing and turning a few times. She tried her best to keep still, although she wasn't sure she had fooled him.

Her foot was on the top stair as she heard the water in the shower turn off. Good timing she thought as she placed his coffee on the night stand.

He came out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around him. She walked by and touching his shoulder made her way to the sink. Looking at her self in the mirror she thought "you don't look like someone with cancer". She stuck out her bottom lip and shrugged her shoulders at her reflection.

This time she said out loud "no shower, no shampoo, and no make-up. You'll scare the hell out of them Penny."

"What?" Leonard asked, peeking his head around the corner. He was now nearly dressed.

"Oh nothing. Just talking to myself."

She stripped and started to brush her teeth.

"You're doing that on purpose. You'll get me going again."

"The ADA says that brushing your teeth in the nude causes 14% less cavities." She said and closed the door. "Sorry, but I can't have you getting ideas."

She turned the water on harder and flushed the toilet. She had begun to cry and didn't want him to hear her. To worry more about her. She just needed a few minutes to compose herself.

7:30 and they were ready to go. She had packed an overnight bag with some extra clothes just in case. He took the bag and placed it over his shoulder. He carried his computer bag in one hand, held her hand with the other. They made their way down the stairs and out to his car.

They drove to the cancer center in silence. Both too nervous to speak. Penny looked absentmindedly out the window. He pulled he car into the parking lot, to a space not too far from the door and turned off the engine.

"You know that no mater what happens from here on out, I love you and I'll always be here for you. You know that, right?" He said turning toward her and taking hold of her hand.

She nodded quickly, squeezed his hand and went to get out of the car. He followed, reaching into the back seat to grab her overnight bag and his computer case.

Entering, Penny found the room they needed on the directory. The email sent the night before had told her which room to look for. Just before reaching the designated office, they met Penny's physician, Dr. Gray.

"Good morning Penny."

"Good morning Dr. Gray" she returned and shook the hand he offered. "This is my boyfriend Leonard Hofstadter."

Dr. Gray turned to Leonard and shook his hand warmly. "Nice to meet you Leonard. We are going to take good care of your young lady here."

"Thank you Dr. Gray" Leonard said nervously.

"Come this way. I'll walk with you the rest of the way." They followed as he spoke about the weather.

They arrived at the designated office. Dr. Gray ushered them in and walked around and sat down at the desk. He then pointed to the two chairs waiting in front of him. Penny and Leonard sat ready to listen to the doctor.

Tenting his fingers in front of him, he began; "Penny, the first thing we are going to do is to give a you a CT scan. That way we can look to see if there are any more problem lymph nodes that we should look at and be aware of."

Penny nodded her head silently, gripping Leonard's hand tightly.

"Then we are going to take a biopsy of the swollen node we found under your left arm. We will test the piece of tissue we remove and should have some results for you on Monday. Tuesday at the absolute latest. Do either of you have any questions?"

Penny shook her head no. Leonard asked "if the biopsy doesn't show the sample to be cancerous, what would that mean?"

"In that case I believe we would be looking at an infection and there are some measures, mostly medication that we can take."

Penny then said "what if it is cancerous?"

In an even tone, Dr. Gray said "depending on how far along the cancer seems to be, we would take either a course of radiation treatment or chemotherapy ."

This time it was Leonard who gripped her hand tightly.

Just then a nurse entered the office. Dr Gray said "and here is Teresa. She's the nurse that will be taking care of you today. She'll bring you to a room to change and then down to the testing area."

"Hi Penny" Teresa said extending her hand. Penny taking it and looked into the friendly, smiling eyes. She felt a little more at ease already.

"Hi" she said. Her voice came out a little shaky. Teresa immediately took the hand she was shaking in both her hands. She then turned to Leonard releasing Penny's hands. I'm Leonard, Penny's boyfriend. He shook hands with the nurse.

"Happy to meet you Leonard. Why don't you both come with me and we'll get you all situated."

Dr. Gray stood up from the desk. "I see you are in good hands with Teresa. I'll see you after the CT scan." Both Penny and Leonard nodded as Dr. Gray left.

They followed Teresa out of the office and down the corridor and through some double doors. There were numerous rooms on either side. She stopped in front of room number 4. It had Penny's name printed on a white board next to the door.

Teresa opened the door and stood back to let Penny in. Leonard handed Penny her bag and went to sit in one of the chairs lining the corridor wall.

"Can he come in with me?" she asked Teresa anxiously.

"Of course if you want him to."

Looking relieved, she held out her arm and grabbed Leonard's shirt saying "C'mon baby!" He stood up and followed her into the room.

It was equipped like any examining room. On the examining table there was a gown for her to change into. As Teresa left, she began to get undressed. Leonard helped by carefully folding her clothes. He had no idea what else to do.

The gown was light blue, made of paper. She had a matching colored bonnet on her head. A whisp of blonde hair escaped. He went to tuck it in, but stopped. Even now, he found her beautiful. It took his breath away.

Teresa reappeared with a wheel chair. "Sorry, rules. This is your means of transportation down to have your CT scan." Penny sat in the seat and gripped the arm rests.

"Can Leonard come?"

"I'm sorry, but he can only come as far as the entrance. Leonard there are plenty of chairs there for you to sit to wait. I see you have a work bag with you. There is also a desk if you care to use it."

He nodded and picked up his bag and followed as Teresa wheeled Penny down the hall.

When they reached the testing area, Leonard walked in front of the wheel chair and bent down and gave Penny a deep kiss. As he pulled away, she kept her eyes closed for a beat, then opened them and said "see you in a bit." Teresa then wheeled her away.

Penny had been back for about twenty minutes when Dr. Gray breezed into the examining room.

"Okay. I'm glad we did the CT scan." He placed several transparencies on the illuminated reader in the room showing several views of the areas of Penny's body scanned. Pointing to different views as he spoke, he continued. "Along with the lymph node under your left arm that we felt swollen during your check-up last week, we found some additional swollen lymph node masses in your chest and in your lower back. That explains the pain you were experiencing there. They range in size from 3 to 5 centimeters. Not unusual, but there are more than I would have hoped for. " Penny nodded as Leonard rubbed her back.

"What's next?" Leonard asked.

"Well I would like to take a sample of the original node we saw under her arm" he then turned to Penny and said "then another from your back. It will make the procedure a little longer, but I want to be sure. Alright?" Penny nodded her head in assent.

"Very good. Let's get things started!" He turned and left the exam room. Several seconds later, Teresa was back. She gathered up the transparencies and placed them in an envelope marked with Penny's name along with other important information. Leonard noticed there was a notation "Emergency Contact: L. Hofstadter" and included his cell and work numbers. Seeing the word emergency made him shudder.

"Shortly the anesthesiologist will come in and talk things over with you both." Giving another smile, she left the room.

"This seems to be happening much faster than I thought", she said quietly.

"I know" he replied "but maybe that's a good thing. The quicker things happen, the quicker we'll know." She shook her head in agreement.

Just then, the anesthesiologist entered and introduced himself as Dr. Harris. He was blunt and to the point. He went on to explain that they would not be putting her fully "under". Because of what was going on in the area of her chest, they would not be putting a breathing tube in for full sedation. She would receive a very strong general anesthesia. This would make her feel, in a word he said, extremely drunk.

"I can do that" she said and both she and Leonard giggled softly. No comment or response from Dr. Harris. After answering some general questions from them both, such as the possibility of feeling sick after receiving the drugs, or of not having the anesthetic work completely, he calmed their fears with assurances that the kind of drugs to be used were typical and not at all very harsh. He took his leave, telling Penny he would see her in about twenty minutes for the procedure.

Teresa then reappeared, wheeling a gurney into the room. "Your chariot awaits!" she said gleefully, trying to put them both at ease. She could read the nervousness in the room. Penny hopped up on the conveyance. Teresa then wheeled it out into the hall and down the corridor and around a corner to another set of double doors-the operating room. Pushing the gurney to the side, the nurse said she would be right back.

Penny sat on the gurney, swinging her legs. He laughed that they had let her keep her flip-flops on. She refused to wear "those ridiculous hospital style slippers." Her words. Her purse sat next to her. She looked at it and spread her hands out wide and said "Oh!"

She picked up the purse and began to rummage through it. "It's in here somewhere. Can't have gotten too deep." Still fishing with her head down, then looking up with her tongue stuck out to the side (it reminded him of something or someone a long time ago; and lemonade; and made him furrow his brow trying to remember) and a look of deep concentration, she produced what she was looking for.

"Here it is!" she looked at him with a grin of success on her face. She held a piece of paper folded neatly. She handed it to him and said "That's for you. Read it later on."

He went to unfold it. She put her hand gently on his arm and shook her head no. "Please. Wait until later on." He shrugged his shoulders and put the paper in his pants pocket.

"Okey-dokey!" it was Teresa's bright and breezy voice. She carried some blankets and a pillow.

"They're nearly ready for you honey" she said to Penny. She placed the pillow at the head of the gurney, then walking around Leonard placed the blanket on the end.

"Let's help her hop down for a sec." Leonard took her elbow in his hand as she shuffled her way off and then stood on the floor.

In one motion, Teresa shook out the blanket so it covered the bed on the gurney then nodded to Leonard, who helped Penny back into the sitting position she was in at the beginning.

"Now the O.R., where they conduct the procedure, well, it's going to be pretty cold. The blanket will be around you, but do want some slippers to keep your feet warm?"

Penny shook her head now quickly. "Yeah they are pretty hideous. Did you bring socks? You can wear those if you want. Sorry, but the flip-flops have to stay here with Leonard" Teresa said looking back and forth between the couple.

"I brought socks" she said quietly.

"I'll go get them. Is there time?" Leonard said anxiously.

"Plenty. We'll wait right here for you, won't we Penny?" She nodded this time. Also quickly. Leonard touched her hand and ran off toward the room she had changed in.

She looked after him as he hustled on his errand. She then looked down at her hands sitting in her lap.

Teresa watched her and said "He's pretty special isn't he?"

"That and so much more. He is a blessing to me. He's the love of my life" she said in a soft voice. The nurse nodded and smiled. Leonard was headed back toward them; white athletic socks in his hand. Penny slipped them on and handed Leonard her purse and the flip-flops.

"Well, I'll give you two a minute or so, but then we'll have to get you in there, okay?" Teresa said again looking back and forth between them and gave them some privacy, such as it was in the corridor.

Leonard thought of something and reached into his pocket.

"One of the things we've never talked about directly is religion." She looked at him questioningly. He continued: "I'm not really religious on any level, science and all, but I've heard you talking with Bernadette every once in a while, so I got you this."

He produced a silver medal and began to pin it to her gown. "It's Saint Peregrine. He is the patron saint of cancer patients.

She looked at it, then at him and cried "Leonard! Thank you!" Just then Teresa returned and said "alright Penny. It's time."

He hugged her and whispered "see you before you know it". She nodded and lay back on the gurney putting her head on the pillow. Teresa expertly covered her with the blanket. She squeezed Leonard's hand and said "I love you". Teresa wheeled her away. She held onto his hand until she was forced to let go.

After they had gone through the entrance doors of the O.R. and were out of site, Leonard made his way to one of the chairs lining either wall of the corridor. Sitting down, he shoved her purse with the flip-flops on top of it under the chair. Thinking of something he stood and reached into his pocket and withdrew the paper Penny had handed him.

Sitting down, he carefully unfolded it. It was a poem, copied in her handwriting. At the top:

somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond.

by e.e. cummings

After which she wrote 'this is you and me'

"somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond

any experience, your eyes have their silence:

in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,

or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me

though i have closed myself as fingers,

you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens

(touching skillfully, mysteriously) her first rose

or if your wish be to close me, i and

my life will shut very beautifully, suddenly,

as when the heart of this flower imagines

the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals

the power of your intense fragility: whose texture

compels me with the color of its countries,

rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes

and opens; only something in me understands

the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)

nobody, not even the rain, has such small hands"

He folded it carefully and placed it in his upper jacket pocket so that it was close to his heart. He blinked back tears, sat, and waited.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Everything out in the open

**A/N: This took a little longer to get out than I thought. I've been easily distracted this week. I so enjoyed your reviews for the last chapter. I very, very, very much love to receive them. It is very exciting to have one come into the inbox, so keep them coming! As always, I own absolutely nothing having to do with The Big Bang Theory. I just really enjoy and love it! Thanks!**

Even though they did not put her "under", Penny had fallen asleep as a result of the anesthesia. Since she was the only patient in a post operation situation, they let Leonard sit with her in the recovery room. He sat in a chair next to the bed she lay in, gently stroking her hair. Teresa would check in every few minutes, giving Leonard a smile. After twenty minutes, she began to stir. Leonard tried to catch Teresa's eye. The nurse hustled over.

As she awoke, the automatic blood pressure cup began to inflate to take the reading. Penny looked down at the armband held fast to her bicep by the Velcro straps. She touched the medal he gave her. She then looked up at Teresa and asked anxiously, "where is Leonard?"

Teresa smiled down at her. Leonard answered "I'm right here" taking her hand. She shifted her head so she could look directly at him.

"Before I fell asleep" she said to him, her voice still groggy; dreamlike. "They had beautiful music playing. I asked what it was and they told me Dr. Harris likes classical music and that it was one of Bach's cello concertos-Leonard a cello; you were there with me, in that music." He smiled at her, touching her cheek. "It wasn't so scary after that."

"How is the pain Penny?" Teresa asked. Turning toward the nurse and gripping Leonard's hand she replied "um it hurts under my arm. Kind of a lot now that I'm thinking about it."

"I've got something here that will make that better. It's an injection, you'll feel a little pinch, so look at Leonard and I'll be quick."

True to her word there was a pinch and Penny breathed in quickly, her eyes never leaving Leonard's.

"Now we will need to have that pain decrease a little and keep an eye on your vitals. Hopefully you'll be able to go home in a few hours. If you want, you can stay overnight instead."

"I'd rather go home." she answered quietly.

"Okay. I'll check back in a little bit. The pain medication may cause you to sleep a little more, but that's alright. Just relax." Penny nodded at her. She then left them alone.

Penny smiled at Leonard. She blinked a few times and closed her eyes. She was asleep.

While she was in the operating room, Leonard took the chance to call Dr. Gablehouser. He told his department head that he needed to take vacation time, maybe two weeks to attend to a close friend who had a medical emergency. Dr. Gablehouser asked him if it was Penny. When Leonard told him it was, he told him to take as much time as he needed and to let him know how things were going.

"Thank you Eric" Leonard replied. "I can't tell you how much I appreciate it."

"Don't worry about anything Leonard. Take care of her and take care of yourself."

Leonard thanked him again and ended the call.

Leonard would need to speak with Penny as to what and how much to tell their friends. He had begun to receive emails and texts from Howard, Raj, Amy and Bernadette. Bernadette had also left a voice message on his cell phone, not quite panicking, but wondering why no one had seen Penny for several days. He had ducked that telephone call, but decided he would take the next he received.

Forty-five minutes later, Penny seemed to be totally awake. All of her vital signs were fine. The pain, although still there, had been minimized. Dr. Gray had stopped by and pronounced both tissue samples of the lymph nodes taken excellent and he did not see any reason why they would not know the results by late Monday morning. He wrote Penny a prescription for some pain medication and left her to Teresa.

"You won't be able to shower or bathe for the next few days. You can do a sponge bath, just so long as you stay away from under your left arm and the area on your lower back where the samples were taken. No exercising that left arm and be careful the way you twist and turn your back. I'd say yoga was out of the question for the time being. Do either of you have any questions?" After two beats of silence Teresa said "okay, let's get you back to the examining room your were in originally. You can get dressed and be on your way."

Leonard helped her into a wheel chair and let Teresa push her back to the room. He carried her purse and the flip-flops along with his work bag. When they arrived, Teresa picked up a folder on the counter in the room and handing it to Penny said "there are numbers for me and Dr. Gray there along with the number here for the center. You will also find some more detailed instructions, expanding on what we've talked about already. If you have any questions, or if the pain medication isn't working-any reason at all, give a call. If either of you just need to talk or shoot the breeze, feel free to call me. I guess we will see you on Monday."

They both thanked her for all her help. She put her hand on Penny's arm as she left the room and said "take care. See you soon."

The discharge complete, He walked Penny slowly out to his car. He opened the door and helped her into the passenger seat. He put her overnight bag along with her purse and his work bag in the back seat. Trotting around and getting behind the wheel, he looked over at her before starting the car. She sat there with a blank expression on her face.

"What time is it?" she asked. Swiping open his phone, he answered "4:58. Why"

"I think you'd better take me to my apartment. We need to talk to them."

Leonard nodded in agreement. "Do you want me to call and see that everyone will be there?" This time she nodded.

Leonard selected 'contacts' on his phone and scrolled to Bernadette's name and hit call. She answered immediately.

"Leonard! Thank God. You've had us worried sick. Howard said that you had requested an emergency vacation at the university. Is everything alright? What's going on? Is Penny with you?"

"I'm fine Bernadette. Yes I've taken some vacation time and yes Penny is here."

Bernadette let out a sigh of relief, then lit into him "listen bucko, you've got some explaining to do-"

Leonard interrupted her and said "Bernadette. I'm on my way now with Penny. We're going to her apartment. Can you make sure everyone is going to be around tonight? We'd like to see you all and-and well talk some things over."

Bernadette was silent for a few seconds, letting Leonard's request sink in. She answered quietly "I'll make sure everyone will be at Sheldon and Amy's place. How about 7:00?"

"That's great. Thanks Bernadette. See you all then" and he ended the call.

With a sense of dread, she hit Howard's icon on her contacts. "Hello beautiful" he answered.

"Howard. I heard from Leonard. He's coming by with Penny. Something is wrong. He won't say what, but I could tell from the way he was talking."

"I'm sure everything's alright honey" Howard said, trying to calm his wife.

"No Howard. There was something in his voice. Something is wrong" she repeated her fear. "Can you pick up Raj and bring him over to Sheldon's? I'll call him and Amy to let them know."

"Of course. I'm on my way."

"Thanks Howie. I love you."

"I love you too." They each signed off.

Bernadette thought for a moment, then picked up her purse and keys. Hitting Amy's number on her phone she began as soon as her friend said 'hello'.

"Amy. I just heard from Leonard. He is bringing Penny to her place. Something is going on. They want us all to meet at your and Sheldon's place at 7:00. Where are you and Sheldon now?"

"We're on our way home" Amy answered.

"Good" Bernadette countered. Why don't you stop and pick up some food? Do you and Sheldon mind if I let myself in with the extra key you gave me and Howard?"

"No. Please do. You may meet them as they're getting home. I'll let Sheldon know what's going on."

"Thanks Amy. See you in a little while."

Amy went on to explain the plan to Sheldon. He scoffed a bit at Bernadette entering their apartment before they got home. Amy mentioned that it was the social convention to make things easier for close friends when there was a crises looming. And Bernadette was not one to 'cry wolf' for frivolous reasons.

Sheldon agreed with Amy's reasoning and suggested that they stop for Thai food, because it was among Penny's favorites.

"Bernadette is going to make sure they are all going to be there" Leonard said. Penny nodded her head. "Do you feel up to this?"

"Yeah. It will just be sitting and talking. I'll be fine. As long as you're there with me." He smiled and gripped her hand. They pulled into the parking lot of 2311 North Los Robles Avenue.

It had taken everything out of Penny to walk up to the 4th floor. They hadn't really thought about the stairs when they planned on going to apartment 4B. She sat on her love seat with her feet on the coffee table, drinking a bottle of water, one of the few things remaining in the refrigerator. Leonard was sitting next to her. "It really seems like forever since I've been here" she said looking around the room. "But it's only been what four days?"

"Maybe that's because you've found a new home" he said with a smile.

She smiled back and said "that must be it." She scooted over to be closer to him.

There was a knock at the door, followed by Bernadette's voice.

"Penny. Leonard. It's me. Bernadette."

Leonard got up and walked to the door, opened it and greeted Dr. Rostenkowski-Wolowitz with a smile and a warm "Hi Bernadette. Come in."

Bernadette gave back a brief smile, walked over and sat next to Penny.

"Hi Bernadette" she said as brightly as she could manage.

"Hi honey" she returned.

Penny began making small talk, asking how things were and asking after Howard. Bernadette replied to each question, however she was on automatic pilot. She had begun to look Penny over. To study her for any "tells". It didn't take long for her eyes to fall on the medal she had pinned to her blouse. Bernadette had a strict Catholic upbringing. She knew most of the saints and what they were patrons of. She recognized Saint Peregrine. Though her eyebrows rose quickly, she was able to control her emotions. She cleared her throat and let her eyes shift toward Leonard. She watched him shift his weight uneasily. She had her answer.

Penny was surprised by the huge hug the Bernadette enveloped her in, without any warning. The shorter blonde, then stood up, hugged Leonard equally as hard and said "well, I'll see you two in just a little bit. I'm going back next door. Amy will be expecting me. They're coming with food and I'm going to get some things ready".

She smiled sweetly at the couple, walked quickly across the hall, closed the door and broke down in tears.

Bernadette was in the bathroom composing herself when she heard the door open. She called out "I'm in the bathroom." She looked at her reflection in the mirror, satisfied that she had erased all evidence of her tears and how upset she was. Proof of the nightmare her two friends may be in.

Walking out to the living area she greeted Amy and Sheldon.

"Thank you very much for getting here ahead of us Bernadette" Sheldon said. The essence of politeness.

"You're welcome Sheldon." It was the nicest thing he ever said to her. She smiled sweetly at her. He smiled back, with what Amy recognized as his 'koala smile'.

Bernadette continued "I went across the hall. Leonard and Penny are there."

Amy turned to her excitedly. "Should I go over and get them?" she asked quickly.

"I think that would be a great idea" Bernadette replied. As she finished the sentence, Amy was out the door.

"Bernadette?" Sheldon said. "Amy said you thought that something was wrong. What did you mean by that?"

"I'm not sure Sheldon." She wasn't entirely lying. "There was just something in Leonard's voice when I spoke with him on the phone. I guess we'll find out soon enough. Sheldon nodded, deep in thought.

Amy burst through the door pulling Penny by the hand. Leonard following. Just behind them were Howard and Raj. With Raj was Elyse Anderson. They were holding hands.

A huge 'hub-bub' ensued. The group teasing Raj and greeting Elyse. Leonard made his way to the easy chair he was accustomed to sitting in. Penny followed, waited for him to sit and then curled up in his lap. Her arms around his neck and head on his shoulder.

Everyone else found places to sit as well and began passing around the food for dinner. After people had finished, Bernadette got up and started to clear away the to-go boxes and plates. Penny rose at the same time.

"No-no sweetie. You sit right there. You look so comfy with Leonard. Howard will help me, won't you Howie?"

"Um sure Howard jumped up and picked up some additional dishes, following his wife to the kitchen. Amy got up as well asking who wanted coffee or tea. Getting her orders, she went about her task.

Twenty minutes later everyone was gathered back in the living room. Penny and Leonard looked at each other. She gave him a slight nod.

"Hey guys" he began. "We called Bernadette to get you all together. We have some news."

Howard interjected "from the position of a certain blonde, my guess would be that you two are back together?"

Penny smiled at Howard and tapped her nose with her finger, signaling that he was correct.

"That's part of it" Leonard answered with a smile. "We _are_ back together and Penny has agreed to move in with me over on Monterey Street."

Gasps of delight from their friends. Amy hopped up and hugged the couple. The others wished them congratulations.

After a few moments, Penny's eyes met Bernadette's. Bernadette's smile was sad. Penny smiled back with tears forming in her eyes.

"There's more she said, sitting up straight, but still in Leonard's lap. He wrapped his arms around her waist. Her arms folded around his. The room was silent.

"Most of you know I've been having some issues lately with back problems and losing weight without even trying. I've also had some other things going on and I finally decided to go for a physical." Every eye in the room was on her. She looked down at her arms and Leonard's.

She continued in a monotone. Very matter-of-fact. "During the exam my doctor discovered I had a extremely swollen lymph node under my arm. Just to be safe, he wanted to do some more tests. This morning we went to the cancer center at the university and they gave me a CT scan. Along with the spot under my arm, they found additional nodes swollen in my back and in my chest." Amy gasped and put her hand over her mouth. Bernadette gripped Howard's hand and fought back tears. Raj looked down at the floor. Sheldon stared blankly at Leonard.

"They took a biopsy of the node under my arm and one in my lower back. We'll have the tests back on Monday." She sighed deeply and stood up.

Everyone in the room stood with her. Amy was the first to hug her, followed by Raj and Elyse. Howard and Bernadette with their arms around each other hugged her at the same time, each with their free arm. Sheldon followed suit.

Amy with tears in her eyes said as positively as she could "it may turn out to be something else entirely. You could have an infection or even some sort of virus. You lymph nodes could just be working overtime to fight off something other than….." her voice trailed off. Penny nodded her head in understanding.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I really wanted to get this update out today and I succeeded! Today is the birth anniversary of my favorite poet e.e. cummings (he is the author of the poem Penny handed to Leonard before the biopsy in Chapter 8), born on October 14, 1894 in Cambridge, Massachusetts. **

**Thank you so much for continuing to read this story. I know the subject matter is tough, but it will get better, I promise. My main purpose was to show love and friendship under the most trying times. Thanks to all who have reviewed, followed and made this a favorite. It is appreciated more than you know. I own nothing that has anything to do with The Big Bang Theory.**

Chapter 10: The news, and other things, delivered.

They were waiting in the outer office for the doctor to arrive. His assistant had called at 8:00 that morning to let them know the results would be in by 11:00. If they could come in to see him then, he would review everything with them. They left nearly immediately, stopped for coffee and bagels. It was now 10:45.

Penny was much more calm, outwardly, then Leonard. He kept standing up and walking to the doorway of the office to look down the corridor, either way. He wasn't sure what he was looking for. He just needed something to do other than sit there.

Finally she stood up and grabbed him by the shoulders and said "baby, come sit with me and hold my hand. No use in getting yourself all worked up." He nodded, followed her and sat down.

Dr. Gray breezed in at 10:58. He greeted them saying "good morning! Give me three minutes to get settled and I'll bring you right in." He shook both their hands and went into his office, shutting the door behind him.

Just then a young man dressed in scrubs entered the outer office with a large envelope under his arm. He nodded at the couple, knocked softly on the door and entered. Three minutes later he came out of the office, closed the door, nodded at them once again and disappeared out of the outer office door.

It was another ten minutes before Dr. Gray reappeared. "Thank you for your patience. A busy morning so far. Please. Come in." He stood beside the door and ushered them in. They each took a seat in front of the desk. Penny held Leonard's hand in a vice-like grip.

He gathered up parts of a file that had been spread out on his desk. "Alright. It looks like we have two malignancies here."

Silence.

Leonard went to speak first, but he was failing to produce any words. Finally, "wha-what course do you suggest?"

"Because both samples showed cancerous cells, I think it best for us to purse chemotherapy." Leonard nodded and turned toward her. She was extremely pale and had a vacant look on her face. She turned her head slowly toward him. She looked like a lost little girl. He knelt down in front of her and held her in his arms. She finally responded, putting her arms around his neck.

He expected her to fall apart, but taking a few deep breaths, she cleared her throat, withdrew her arms from around him, but keeping her hand on his arm as he sat again, commenced to question the doctor.

"When do you think we-I should begin treatment?" was her first question. He notice that the color had returned to her face. No tears, just a determination.

"I would say the sooner, the better-either by the end of this week or the beginning of next."

Looking at Leonard, she nodded her agreement. "Okay. You tell me where and when." Nodding and issuing a huge sigh that had her raising and lowering her shoulders, she said "Let's do it."

Dr. Gray gave Penny the name of an oncologist he recommended. It was the same Doctor that had analyzed the biopsy and made the diagnosis. Dr. Gray also gave her the name of several other oncologists in case she wanted to make a different choice. Whenever that was Dr. Gray said, she would need to make an appointment with whoever she chose so some additional tests could be done and the process explained to her.

As the appointment was over, Penny and Leonard rose to take their leave. Dr. Gray walked around the desk and took both of Penny's hands in his.

"Penny, I know that this is a lot to take in this morning. I want you to know that I will be involved with whichever oncologist you choose. She nodded her understanding as Dr. Gray looked between her and Leonard. He continued: "You are a young woman and other than this diagnosis you are in very, very good health. There is no reason to expect anything but a positive outcome."

Penny and Leonard thanked him profusely. Penny gave him a hug, Leonard shook his hand. They left the office and walked in silence back to Leonard's car in the lot.

She broke down while sitting in the car. Leonard was ready. He had waited a few moments before starting the car. He held her for about five minutes.

"Okay. I'm done now. I'm not going to let that happen again-except maybe for when we speak with my parents." She said it matter-of-factly as she wiped her eyes with a tissue Leonard had handed her.

"I don't think I'm up for another emotional time like we had Friday. Would it be awful to make some calls instead of having a bunch of people over. I really don't want another 'event' right now" she said softly.

"I think that would be fine and I know no one will mind at all. I can make the calls for you-"

"No" she interrupted him. "I'll do it." She had her phone out and clicked on Bernadette's name.

After she had made the fifth call (she wanted to tell each friend separately, even the couples), she sat quietly, turned away from Leonard and looked out the window. Each friend expressed their sorrow at the news. They all shed tears over the phone, except for Sheldon. His voice trembled and he got off the phone as soon as he could manage it. She would speak with him face to face later.

She sat quietly, turned away from Leonard looking out the window. He took her hand and caressed her thumb with his. It was at this point that she had noticed that the car had stopped. He had driven her to the beach.

"Were at the beach" she said turning toward him with a smile at last.

"C'mon. Why don't we walk for a bit." He kissed her hand and got out of the vehicle, making his way to her door. Opening it, he held out his hand to help her out. Sitting on the hood of the car, he took off his shoes and socks and rolled up his pant legs. She took off her flip-flops and also rolled up her jeans. She handed him her footwear and he put both pair in the back seat, locked the door and took her hand to lead her down toward the water.

She dropped his hand and took his arm. She rested her head on his shoulder, saying "this is just the thing. Thank you Leonard."

They walked back and forth along the shore talking about everything, even her sickness. After about an hour he noticed she was getting tired. He asked if she wanted to head back. She nodded her head and said "yes."

By the time they arrived back at Monterey Street, she was asleep. Parking, he jostled her gently. She opened her eyes and said "hey you." He smiled and said "we're home. Let's get you into bed."

"Oh Doctor Hofstadter" she said sleepily, yet playfully, but did not argue as he got her into the house and tucked her into bed for a nap.

He puttered around downstairs, trying to make as little noise as possible. He went silently to the second floor to retrieve his lap top. He was going to check emails from work.

Nearly two hours later, it was nearly 4:45, he heard noises from the bedroom upstairs. He trotted up to see if she needed help.

They bumped into each other in the hallway outside the bedroom. She was wearing one of his t-shirts, making him smile. She looked down, then back up at him "Oh. Yeah. I'm sorry. You don't mind do you?"

"Of course not. Trust me when I tell you that my t-shirts look much, much better on you than they do on me."

"Right answer Romeo" she said laughing. She took him by the hand and led him down the stairs.

Letting go of his hand and leaving him in the living room, she headed toward the kitchen. Over her shoulder, she called to him "I'm getting some water, do you want anything?"

"No. I'm good he said in response.

She returned to the living room and sat next to him on the couch. She placed her bottle of water on a coaster on the coffee table and put her hand on his thigh. He quickly covered her hand with his. She searched his eyes and said "We need to call my parents." He nodded in agreement. "Will you talk to them with me?" Again, he nodded. "Good." She leaned into him and gave him a deep kiss, with more than a little passion. Surprised, he returned the kiss, just as enthusiastically.

"Before we call them, can we talk about some things?"

"Of course anything. What is it?" He replied sitting forward now.

"I was awake for a little while upstairs and did a lot of thinking and have made some decisions."

"Great! Tell me about them."

"First I'm going to tell them I'm not going back to The Cheesecake Factory." He nodded and smiled, replying "I'm glad." he said, smiling harder. "I know about time, right?" she answered, also with a smile.

"Next, I'm going to ask Elyse if I can start and maybe work on some sort of reduced schedule at the library while we figure out how the treatments will work out and what effect they are going to have on me." He looked at her with a furrowed brow, squeezing her hand that was on his thigh. She squeezed his leg back.

Seeing the look on his face and knowing what he was thinking she said, "I was doing some reading the other night on-line. Cancer treatments have different effects on different people, so we won't really know until they begin, or even just after how I'll be feeling."

He returned, "I read the same thing. Penny, I don't want you to push yourself with working during the-during the time you're receiving chemo. You know you don't have to work at all, don't you?"

"I know Leonard, but I want to if I can. I don't want to be home looking at the walls and just waiting. If I can work, I'm going to." She said this with her new found determination. "Elyse already mentioned that they would work with me on any kind of schedule I need to." As an after thought she said "I wonder how much Raj had to do with that." Leonard nodded his agreement. "More than a little, I think."

She was quiet for a few moments. "The last thing is the most important. This is something that I've been thinking of for the longest time. Since before you came back from the Hawking expedition." Before he could respond, she put her finger on his lips. Taking a deep breathe, she said to herself "here goes."

"Marry me."

His head jerked back and he looked deeply into her eyes to see if it was true. If it was the illness speaking. Whether she was asking out of fear.

She took his hand and brought it to her cheek. She held it there with her eyes closed.

"I mean it. Marry me."

He slid closer to her and removing his hand from hers, he wrapped her in his arms; noticing again for the umpteenth time over the last week how thin she was getting.

"Penny" he said softly pulling back to look at her. Her eyes were searching his once again. Looking for her answer.

"You know that I'll be here for you. That I will do anything for you." She nodded. And replied

"Then Marry me. If you love me. Marry me."

"I don't want you to do anything that you'll regret" he said quietly. Her brow was now furrowed.

"Look. When you beat this thing" he continued " you might not want the same things that you think you want right now. I don't want to be the one to hold you if-well if you don't want to be held."

"First, you" she interrupted him.

"I'm not beating anything. _We're_ going to beat this. Together. You and me. And when this thing" she grabbed at her body. Under her arm. At her back; her chest. She was crying

"When this thing is dead, we'll have killed it." Now softer "We'll have killed it together. We'll have killed it together because our love Leonard; _our _love is stronger than anything. I'm not going anywhere. Not without you. I want to be held. I want you to hold me. Hold me forever. Hold me forever Leonard. Don't let me go."

He finally smiled. When he did, her face lit up for the first time in days. "You will, won't you? Won't you Leonard; you'll marry me?"

"I will."

At those two words she exploded with joy. Leaping off the couch and dancing around the living room. She then returned to his arms and wrapping herself around him, getting as close to him as possible while standing in the middle of the room, she whispered "let's do it as soon as possible. Let's go somewhere and not tell anyone and just get married. We'll find a justice of the peace and a nice old couple to be witnesses and we'll just get married."

He laughed at her and said "anything you want."

"Well right now I want and need you." She began to undress him and led him to the couch; her lips never leaving his.

Over an hour later, she got up from the couch and gave him a look somewhere between the most wicked leer that had ever been aimed at him and the sweetest smile, filled with love. She stood looking at him for a few seconds, then started to get dressed.

It was even later now, nearing 7:00. They had a small dinner of mesquite chicken and beans. Together they had begun to clear the dishes, placing them in the dishwasher. They then sat at the kitchen table, taking out her phone and placing it on the table, she held his hand and said "are you ready?"

"I am" he answered. She picked up her phone and hit the contact labeled 'Home/Neb'. The phone on the table was on speaker. Ringing three times, a man answered. Penny greeted him with "Hi daddy. It's me and I'm here with Leonard. Is momma there?"


	11. Chapter 11 A heartfelt conversation &

**A/N: I apologize for taking so long for this update. There has been a lot of things to divert my attention, but I have been thinking about this story constantly. A few things here, I gave Penny a middle name toward the end, using the name of a favorite cousin. I also used the name Lael, which was my mom's. Send me a pm if any of you know a Lael.**

**Thank everyone who has taken the time to read, review, favor and follow this story. It is so, so much appreciate it. I always look forward to them! As always, I own nothing to do with The Big Bang Theory.**

Chapter 11: A heartfelt conversation & Sonoma County; an oasis of bliss

Leonard sat at the kitchen table, doing one of the things he did best. Thinking. In this case, over thinking a subject may be a good thing. The telephone call to Penny's parents had gone reasonably well. Penny's mother was tearful and asked all the right questions. Wyatt was more subdued. Penny had told her parents she had asked Leonard to marry him and he agreed. She fibbed in that she told them they were not in a hurry, but would let them know when they had made a decision.

They had both wanted to come to California as soon as possible. Penny convinced them to wait until she had her first chemotherapy treatment scheduled and they could arrive in time for that. They both had begrudgingly agreed.

As they were signing off from the call, both parents gave their love. Wyatt concluded with "and we'll talk to you soon, son." Leonard knew exactly what he meant.

It was now close to midnight. He had gotten Penny into bed just after 11:00. Checking in on her a few minutes ago, he knew she was sleeping. As he now surfed the web for medical and cancer awareness sites, he waited for the call.

It didn't take long. The phone, set on vibrate, jittered on the table. The caller i.d. said "Wyatt".

"Hey" he said quietly.

"Are you alone?" her father asked.

"I am. She's sound asleep. I checked on her just a little bit ago."

"I have to tell you, this is devastating news for a parent Leonard."

"It truly is sir" the younger man replied sadly.

"Were there any warning signs? Was there anything you noticed?"

"She had been loosing weight recently. She gave the excuse of eating better. She also had been complaining about back pain, but seemed to shrug it off. Other than that, nothing really sir. I hadn't been back long from the expedition and we had-well, we had a bit of a falling out to be honest sir."

Surprised, Wyatt said "I'm sorry. I didn't know that. What happened"?

"Let me say that I wasn't as much of a gentleman as you would have liked, sir." Leonard replied quietly.

"Well it appears that you've patched that up, so I'm not going to ask further, right now anyway."

"Thank you sir" came back his reply. This was followed by silence for a few moments.

"And this marriage thing, you're on board with that?" the older man asked.

Pausing again and thinking about his own hesitance as to why Penny wanted it so quickly, he replied "I want you and your wife to know that I love Penny. I love her more than life itself. To me anyway, she is life." Silence again before he continued.

"I suppose that I'm more than a little concerned that she may want this because of what she is going through. Out of her fear. I don't want her regretting this decision when she gets past all of this."

Just then she said softly behind him "baby, put it on speaker."

Leonard turned in a flash. "I'm-I'm sorry. I didn't know you were there-"

"I know. Put it on speaker." Her tone was even and her voice was still quite soft.

Leonard complied, putting the phone at the center of the table.

She stepped a little closer to the phone, she was still in the center of the room. "I love him daddy. Yes. I'm a little afraid. But so much less, I think, than if I didn't have him. If I didn't love him so much. This man Daddy, this man has my heart like no one else has ever before. He knows me body, mind and soul. Sometimes I know I just infuriate him, but that doesn't mater. He loves me. I know the depth of his love. I just want him to-I need him to know that he is the love of my life. When I'm well again-" the entire time she was speaking her eyes never left his. Now she walked across the room and took both of his hands in hers. "When I'm well again, the only place I'm going is into his arms. Never to leave."

It was silent again for a few moments. The couple stood looking at each other. Penny smiled slowly. Her father then cleared his throat.

"Son. I know my daughter pretty well, I think. I'm sure you know that there isn't anyone, including herself, by the way, that is going to make her or force her to do something that she doesn't absolutely want to do."

"Thank you daddy" she said, still softly. She then walked toward the table and picking up his phone "we'll give you and momma a call as soon as we know about scheduling." All three then signed off and Penny hit the 'end call' button and placed the phone back on the table.

"Leonard" she said turning back toward him and walking to where he had moved; to the center of the room, closing the distance between them.

"You've got to stop doubting me. I've meant every word I've said to you over the last few days."

He nodded his head, but remained silent.

"C'mon. Take me to bed. It's late." She took him by the hand and led up the stairs to the bedroom.

Afterward, as it neared 1:45, they lay in each other's arms. His left arm around her neck; his hand playing with her long blond hair. Curled into him with her right arm under his body, her left hand drew circles on his bare chest.

"I've read about the side effects." He hugged her tighter as she spoke.

"There's the hair thing. I'll probably start to loose it slowly as soon as the first treatment."

She pulled her arm out from under him and used it to prop up her head. Her fist rested against her jaw. He did the same. They were facing each other. He took a strand of the hair and tucked it behind her other ear. She took that hand to hold and brought it against her chest.

"There is also a chance of me having a lower fertility rate. It is unusual, but not unheard of for chemo patients to have problems conceiving later."

Removing his hand from hers, he cupped her face. "Dr. Gray said it himself. You are young and otherwise healthy. We have no reason to expect that you will recover fully."

She nodded her head in agreement and said "another thing that will happen soon enough is a loss of libido.-I'm sorry Leonard." A tear escaped from her eye and dropped onto his arm. He retrieved it with his lips.

He pulled her closer and whispered "It's alright. Who knows maybe you'll be the exception there-even if you're not, our relationship is about more than sex."

"I know" she replied. "I just can't imagine not wanting to fu-sorry-hump your brains out. Daily."

He laughed and replied "well you've been doing a pretty good job of that lately."

"I have, haven't I"? And I'm ready again when you are!" Before he could answer, she covered his mouth with hers. His tongue accepting hers as they once again explored the familiar recesses of each other.

He woke the next morning, once again alone in the bed. Reaching for his glasses and phone, he checked the time. 7:55. Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, he got up and made his way to the bathroom. Trotting down the stairs five minutes later, he walked to the living room and seeing her pink lap-top on the coffee table, proceeded to the kitchen.

"Good morning!" She welcomed him enthusiastically, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I heard you get up and go into the bathroom, so I started your coffee. It should be done in a sec."

He came up behind her as she worked at the counter and wrapped his arms around her waist. She leaned back into him, her head on his shoulder. She turned and started kissing him on the jaw.

"Mmmmmmm. I think I Like it when you don't shave. A little rugged there. You're my scientist/lumberjack." She turned so she was in his arms and wrapped her hands around his neck, then began kissing him, hungrily, on the lips.

She pulled back and smiled at him. Breaking away, she handed him his coffee and taking him by the hand pulled him toward the living room. "I want to show you something."

Sitting down on the couch, yanking on his arm until he sat beside her, she turned her lap-top so it was facing them. The screen revealed a page for the Sonoma County website. She had it opened to "Getting Married in Sonoma County".

"Look" she said excitedly. "It's really easy. We can apply and get married the same day if we wanted. We don't need blood tests, there is no waiting period. All we need is our driver's licenses for identification and $83.00."

She turned to him with a huge smile, which he returned. "What did you have in mind?" he asked warily.

"I say we drive up there today and do this tomorrow. What do _you _say?" Her eyes were bright and dancing with excitement.

Looking into those bright green eyes, he responded "Well alright. Let's do it!"

She squealed and once again threw her arms around his neck. "By tomorrow night, I'll be Mrs. Leonard Hofstadter!"

And I'll be married to the most beautiful woman in the world."

"Dr. Hofstadter, you are such a sweet talker." He smiled back at her beaming face.

"Okay. We can fill out the license on line right now." As Penny maneuvered through the prompts on the site, Leonard could not help but smile at how happy and enthusiastic she was. This isn't going to be so bad a thing he thought to himself. We love each other plain and simple. His apprehension of the night before was gone.

The first set of questions pertained to the groom. Penny pushed the lap-top his way. He went through and answered all the questions and hit the "next" button. Penny completed her portion and hit "submit".

"It suggests that we call for an appointment" she said.

"Give me the number. I'll see when they can fit us in tomorrow."

After speaking for a few moments, Leonard disconnected from the call. "We are going to be married tomorrow afternoon at 3:30 p.m. in the County Clerk's office in Santa Rosa. What do you think of that?"

"I can't believe it. I am so happy Leonard. Thank you." Tears were running down her face. They embraced.

Drying her eyes as they broke apart, she said "well we better decide what we're doing. We should probably leave today. We'll need to find somewhere to stay."

Its 8:30 now" he replied. "Why don't you go take a shower and get yourself ready? I'll go online to find a place."

"I'll be quick and then pack!" she said excitedly running up the stairs.

Leonard returned to the lap-top and began to search for accommodations in and around Santa Rosa. He found what he thought would be perfect. He called to see what they had available, keeping his fingers crossed.

Twenty minutes later he walked into the bedroom. Penny was done with her shower and had her suitcase out, beginning to pack. Stopping she looked up at him. "Well, did you have any luck?"

Smiling from ear to ear he replied "We've got three nights at a nice place right in Sonoma."

Squealing once again, she ran and jumped into his arms and once again began to kiss him passionately.

"Hey!" he said disengaging himself from her grasp. "We don't have time for that, we need to pack and get on the road. We have a six and a half hour ride ahead of us."

"Dammit" she said playfully. "Sometimes your being a genius is just so inconvenient." Then she kissed him quickly and continued packing. Leonard left the bedroom to get his suit case stored in the closet in the second bedroom.

They finished their packing quickly. A large suitcase for Penny, a smaller one for Leonard. Each also had a garment bag.

Leonard had taken the suitcases and put them in his trunk. The garment bags he hung on the hooks next to the windows in the back seat. Coming back into the house, Penny was putting on a blazer, smoothing out the lapels, she flipped her hair out from under the collar. "Are we ready?" She asked with a smile.

"We are" he answered back. "I sent a group email to everyone, letting them know we were going out of town for a few days and we would be back late Friday."

She nodded her agreement, still smiling. She took the arm that he offered, and they walked out the door, locked it, then made their way to the waiting car.

He got into the driver's seat and started the car. "It is now 10:15. We have one stop to make then we need to get going."

"Okay, but where do we need to stop?"

"You'll see. I'm surprised you didn't think of it yet." He was smiling from ear to ear.

Her brow was furrowed, but she just shrugged her shoulders and reached over placing her hand on his thigh as he drove.

Ten minutes later, they pulled into the parking lot of a small jewelry store that Howard and Bernadette had used often. Penny squeezed Leonard's thigh, but did not say a word.

"Shall we go inside?" He asked, smiling at her.

"Can we?" she returned, shyly. Laughing, He said "let's go." They both exited the car, Penny running to his side and once again taking his arm. She leaned in and whispered in his ear "I love you".

Forty minutes later, they left the jewelers with two wedding bands and had ordered an engagement ring for Penny. Leonard had also purchased two gold chains, one for each of them.

They were on the road, headed for Santa Rosa by 11:10.

During the ride they talked. A lot. Not only about what they faced within the next few weeks, but about their extended future. They talked about children. They talked about where they would live. They also spoke about college level courses Penny could take toward a library science degree.

Underlying any plans that they made was what would be happening over the next several months. Penny was going to speak to Amy about the list of oncologists Dr. Gray had provided her. She knew that Amy would have familiarity with some, as they worked out of the UCLA medical center. Penny would make her decision by the end of the week, meaning she would be on the phone a bit while they were away.

After about two and a half hours, Penny fell asleep. Her seat was reclined, but she still held Leonard's hand, her life line.

Her slumber occasioned Leonard to once again retreat into his thoughts. He thought of what they spoke of. He thought of her working in a library. Her natural curiosity would be an advantage there. So would her outgoing personality. He could picture her working in information services, or even better, with children. He thought of their own children. The beautiful and smart babies he had predicted to Sheldon so long ago. But would there be children? She was right. It was not uncommon for cancer patients to have fertility issues. Sighing deeply, he thought to himself that they would bear that crises if and when it occurred. What was most important was Penny's getting better, her health returning. That and that they had each other. As much as Penny needed him, he needed her as much, if not more.

He needed to control his thoughts. He was on the verge of tears, both tears fear of what he chanced to lose and tears of happiness of what he had. The beautiful woman next to him.

He glanced over at her and was surprised to see two emerald eyes staring back at him. She smiled sweetly at him and said "hey you".

"Hello sleeping beauty" he said, smiling back at her.

"How long have I been asleep?" she asked as she put her seat back up. She flipped the mirror down and looking at her reflection, she let out an "ugggghhhh" and reached down for her bag.

"You were asleep for about two and a half hours."

"Cool. So we have another hour and a half to go?" she asked as she re-applied her make-up.

"More or less" he replied.

She flipped the visor with the mirror attached up, closed the lipstick she just finished with and put her bag back on the floor. "How do I look?" She asked.

"Fantastic" he answered.

"Another brilliant answer from Dr. Hofstadter" she teased.

They stopped for a bathroom break and a quick fast-food dinner and were back on the road for the last leg of their trip.

This last part passed quickly. They talked and joked. Penny sang along with the satellite radio making Leonard laugh at her exuberance.

They were off the highway now, passing through downtown Santa Rosa.

"You never told me where we were staying" she said suddenly.

"You'll see. Soon."

She beamed in her expectation.

He slowed the car, signaled a left-hand turn and pulled into a parking lot in front of an older well maintained, large home. A grey building. The sign outside said "The Gables Wine Country Inn".

"Oh Leonard, it's a bed and breakfast! You really are the romance ninja!" She through her arms around him even though he had not stopped the car yet.

Pulling into a spot, he turned off the engine and turned to her and gave her a proper hug. "Are you happy?"

"So, so happy."

Grabbing their bags, they made their way to the door. They were welcomed by a young woman "welcome to the Gables Inn" she said cheerfully. "Right this way and we will get you all checked in."

At the desk Leonard gave her their names.

"Okay" the cheerful woman said. Jeffrey here will show you to your room." A tall slender young man appeared behind them. "I'll take your bags sir" he said politely.

"Unfortunately, we are done with dinner this evening." the woman continued. "We serve breakfast from 6:30 to 11:00, so we will see you then."

"Thank you so much" Leonard answered. "We picked up something to eat earlier, so we're all set."

"Enjoy your stay. Don't hesitate to let us know if you need anything."

"Thank you again" Leonard said, turning to follow Jeffrey up the stairs. Penny fell in behind him, grabbing the hand that he reached back for her.

They got to the second floor and passed several rooms before reaching the one meant for them. Jeffrey unlocked the door and stepped to the side to let them enter.

"Oh Leonard" was all Penny could manage.

The room was spacious with a large bed taking up most of one wall. A small end table was found on either side, each with a lamp, the one closer to the door featured the telephone and a clock radio.

On the opposite wall was a desk with a chair. A card on the desk said there was wi-fi internet connection. On the other side of the desk was a small table that held a television set. On the same wall as the entry door was a large bureau that had a mirror over the center.

Finally on the opposite wall, there was a large window with a window seat and two doors, one for a small closet, the other led to the bathroom.

"I hope this is satisfactory Jeffrey said.

"This is perfect Jeffrey" Leonard answered as he reached into his pocket and handed Jeffrey a tip.

Looking down Jeffrey said "thank you very much Mr. Hofstadter. If there is anything you need, don't hesitate to contact the desk. Ask for me and I'll do whatever I can for you." Jeffrey was obviously pleased with the gratuity. He turned and closed the door silently behind him.

"Is there any-" before he could get the complete sentence out, she mashed her mouth into his.

She pulled back from the kiss "you were saying?"

"I just wanted to know if you wanted me to get you anything to eat or drink. We're not too far from downtown."

"The only thing I want for you to get…" she began backing away from him and started to remove her clothing "….is naked."

Smiling wickedly, he answered "that, I can do."

The next morning they were up early and were among the first people in the dining room for breakfast. They had decided to tour one of the local wineries and wanted to get an early start to make sure they were back in time for the most important appointment of their lives.

They each had a bagel, Penny with cream cheese, Leonard with jelly. Penny added some fruit and juice, Leonard coffee. Finishing, they each asked for a coffee to go along with the bill. Paying on the way out, each with a "The Gable Wine Country Inn" travel mug, they made their way to Leonard's car in the parking lot. They held hands swinging their arms.

The trip to Paradise Ridge Winery was not long, maybe twenty minutes away. They arrived to a secluded area, with discreet signs showing the way to the parking lot and the main entrance gate.

"Hello you two!" they were greeted by a bight and chipper woman dressed in khaki shorts and a bright blue Paradise Ridge t-shirt. "Are you here for a tour?"

"We are" he answered trying to sound as excited as the woman.

"Great! We've got one starting in about five minutes. My name is Sally, come on this way and we'll get you set up."

The couple followed Sally into the building, which served as a gift shop and restaurant.

Leonard paid for two tickets for the tour and reserved them a place for an early lunch at noon. Returning to Penny, he put his arm around her and they made their way to a group waiting by another side door. Sally was right behind them.

Both of them found the tour extremely interesting. The grape growing process was explained in length as well as the harvesting and bottling methods used once the grapes were harvested. They were able to view the bottling process and attended a wine tasting. Penny had a blast.

Finally the tour was done, just in time for their noon lunch reservation. They ate a sumptuous lunch, then made purchases at the gift store, which included three cases of assorted wines, some for gifts, some for their own enjoyment.

When all was said and done, it was 1:15. Smiling sweetly at each other, they made their way back to their vehicle and drove back to the inn.

Trotting up the stairs to their room Leonard let Penny use the shower first. Finishing quickly, they traded places. Leonard finished quickly as well and vacated the bathroom to let Penny finish getting dressed and putting on her make-up. Carrying her garment bag, she winked at him and said "see you soon."

After the door shut behind her, Leonard finished drying off and began to get dressed. He had purchased a new suit, charcoal grey, along with a white shirt with thin stripes that matched the suit and a similarly colored tie. Completely dressed now, as he was putting on the finishing touches, he heard the bathroom door. He turned and let out a gasp.

Penny wore a sleeveless cream colored dress that came to her ankles. He knew it was what was called a "tea length dress". Part of her hair was up on the sides, but the remainder fell over her shoulders. Her shoes had no heels and matched the color of her dress.

"You look-you look beautiful; stunning." She smiled at him shyly.

"You look pretty damn fantastic as well. New suit?"

Leonard was having trouble forming words that made sense. He could only stutter "Yyyyeah."

"Smooth" she teased him. "C'mon. Let's go get married" she said, taking his arm.

Nearly out the door, he said "wait!" and ran back to the desk, picking up the velvet box containing the rings.

"All set." They made their way out the door, down the stairs and through the lobby to the main entrance. All eyes were on the beautiful couple. Leonard was too nervous to notice, but Penny took it all in, smiling harder than she ever had in her life.

They arrived at the City Clerk's Office in plenty of time. They gave their names and were asked to wait. They found two chairs together next to several other people waiting.

They were called and approached he counter. Leonard again gave the person behind the counter their names and the reason why they were there. "Did you make an appointment?"

"We did. We were to be here for 3:30?" Leonard answered.

"Yes. Here you are. Hofstadter. " Leonard breathed easier. "Everything seems to be in order." Penny gripped his arm and leaned into him.

"You can pay the fee now, by either cash, check or a major credit card."

Leonard handed the clerk his credit card. It was swiped and the charge went through.

"Alright. If you will come this way" the clerk came around the counter and led them through a side door. They entered a formal room that was clear except for a mahogany desk pushed up against the wall. Toward the front was a podium with the state and county flags as well as the U.S. flag. They didn't tell each other, but they both at that moment thought of Sheldon and "Fun with Flags".

The assistant clerk made her way to a side door that neither of them had noticed. She knocked softly and opened the door a crack and said "the Hofstadter party is ready sir."

Turning back to Leonard and Penny, she said "The chief clerk will be right out. Now it looks like you do not have a witness. We need one by statute. I'll be happy to act in that capacity for you."

"That would be wonderful if you would" Leonard answered.

"Good" she said in return. "My name is Lael Keith."

Pleased to meet you Ms. Keith. I'm Leonard and this is Penny".

"Yes I know. I processed your license application" she said laughing taking Penny's hand.

"Don't mind him Ms. Keith. He's just a little nervous."

"To be expected and please, call me Lael."

"Thank you Lael" Leonard said, shaking her hand and feeling a little more at ease.

Then the clerk entered. "This is Judge Anderson. He is the Chief County Clerk and will be officiating this afternoon. Judge, I'm going to act as witness."

"Very good, very good." the judge returned, shaking hands with both Leonard and Penny.

"Are we ready?" Judge Anderson asked.

"We are" they said it together. Lael smiled. After years of seeing literally thousands of couples, she could sense which ones had a special relationship. This pair surely was among them.

"If you will face each other and join hands?"

They turned in unison and took each other by their hands. Each softly caressed the other with their thumbs. Tears had formed in Penny's eyes. And in Leonard's.

"Leonard, if you'll repeat after me: I Leonard Leaky take you Penelope Marie…..". Leonard did, in a sure and steady voice, gripping the hands of his beloved.

"And Penny, repeat after me: I Penelope Marie take you, Leonard Leaky to be my lawfully wedded husband…." She repeated the words in a soft, steady voice, but still heard by all three in attendance. She looked deeply into his eyes. They were the eyes of the most perfect person she had ever met. They were the eyes that would look back at her in complete adoration for the rest of their lives. She smiled even harder than she did earlier.

"By the power invested in me by the State of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Dr. Hofstadter, you may kiss your bride."

In a matter of milliseconds, they were in each other's arms.

Lael and Judge Anderson looked on in silence. Smiling broadly.


End file.
